Leonard: So, if you don't like Star Wars, why are you here?
Wil Wheaton: Oh, I'm just having fun. Everyone takes Star Wars so seriously, like if the movie's bad it's going to ruin their lives.
Raj: Is it bad? Did you hear something? Oh my God, it's bad. Somebody kill me!

Amy: Sheldon, I know your present is for us to be intimate tonight.
Sheldon: I see. Is that all right?
(Amy kisses Sheldon)
Sheldon: I'm sorry, but this is a litigious society. I'm going to need verbal consent.
Amy: Yes!

Amy: So, what'd you have in mind for tonight?
Sheldon: I thought I could take you out to a nice birthday dinner. If we pick a place
east of here, we might find the balloon.

Sheldon: Oh, I should probably tell you something about this gift.
Amy: You mean, before you give it to me?
Sheldon: Yes. But may I ask you a question before I give it to you?
Amy: Of course.
Sheldon: Why are we saying give it to you like that?

Sheldon: (3 knocks) Birthday girl! (3 knocks) Birthday girl! (3 knocks) Birthday girl!

Sheldon: Sorry I'm late. I also got you a balloon, but it floated away and I chased it for a while.

Sheldon: Well, this is different. Candles and music.
Amy: Do you like it?
Sheldon: It's kind of spooky.
Amy: I can change it back.
Sheldon: No, it's your birthday. As long as no one jumps out in a hockey mask, I'll be fine.

Leonard: Uh, hey, Wil. What'cha doing?
Wil Wheaton: I was on Star Trek. I'm just rooting for the home team.

Raj: Tonight's the night!
Leonard: Yeah, the wait is finally over.
Penny: I know, then you'll finally stop talking about it.

Raj: I can't believe Sheldon gave this up.
Leonard: I know. We're gonna have so much more fun than him.
Bernadette: No, they're not.
Penny: Knowing them, they will.

Sheldon: Thank you, Arthur. You are the wisest of the wise.
Professor Proton: Well, that's very nice of you to say, but I think I'm just an expression of your unconscious mind.
Sheldon: Oh, sure. Well, you're fun to look at.

Professor Proton: Why isn't it ever Angie Dickinson's bedroom?

Professor Proton: Okay. Once the man gets the woman out of her bloomers-

Sheldon: No, not that. I understand the mechanics.
Professor Proton: Oh, good. Good. 'cause I have no idea what kids these days are calling their parts.
Sheldon: I think they say "junk."
Professor Proton: What is happening to this world?

Amy: Okay, what is going on?
Penny: We just want you to be prepared for any surprises that could happen tomorrow.
Amy: What surprises?
Bernadette: We don't want to spoil anything, but you should know that Sheldon said he's ready to be physical.
Amy: You shut your damn mouth! You actually heard him say this?
Penny: Yes, he said he wants to do something to show you how much you mean to him.
Amy: I can't believe it. I don't know what to say.
Bernadette: Well, we're really happy for you and we know how much-
Amy: I do know what to say. Let's get me waxed!