Sheldon: And feel free to tell your guest that the Myanmar catfish is also known as the pilgrim fish. In case the turkey's dry and you need something juicy.

Amy: Sheldon I can tell you want to go, so if you'd be comfortable with it, maybe we could go as friends.
Sheldon: You don't think that will be awkward?
Amy: Well it is Thanksgiving in an aquarium cafeteria, so I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say yes. But if you mean between us I think it'll be fine.

Sheldon: Oh, and forget what I said about the Myanmar catfish. My list of marine-themed pilgrim facts is pretty short.
Amy: Did you know they served shellfish and eel at the very first Thanksgiving?
Sheldon: And there goes my list.

Raj: Have you guys seen this feature that lets you talk to Siri without pressing any buttons?
Howard: No. How does it work?
Raj: You just say, uh, "Hey, Siri, what time is it?"
Siri: The time is 6:37 p.m.
Howard: So now anyone can control your phone? Hey, Siri, show me pictures of naked grandma butts.
Raj: Nice try. It only recognizes my voice.
Howard: Oh, cool. (Imitates Raj): Hey, Siri, show me pictures of naked grandma butts.
Raj: I don't sound like that.
Siri: Here are some images of naked grandma butts.

Sheldon: Hey. Good news, everybody. Now that I'm no longer with Amy, I have an extra ticket to the annual Thanksgiving lunch buffet at the aquarium cafeteria. Who wants it? You realize you won't be going alone. I'll be there the whole time. Providing fish and pilgrim facts.

Bernadette: And Raj and I are volunteering at the soup kitchen, feeding food to the homeless.
Sheldon: Well, Howard, what about you?
Howard: Oh I can't. I'm going to the soup kitchen, too.
Bernadette: You said that sounded like the worst thing ever.
Howard: If you can't support me when I'm lying, why are we married?

Vanessa: And I don't need to tell you, there aren't a lot of men who love physics, archaic languages and flags of the world.
Sheldon: I am a bit of a unicorn.

Raj: How could you send her away?!
Sheldon: She was late. And she found atomic spectroscopy boring. I wouldn't coitus her with your genitals.

Penny: Oh, my God, they're coming right towards us.
Bernadette: We got to get out of here.
Penny: Okay. Well, wait, what about Leonard?
Bernadette: He and his tiny bladder can take the bus!

Dave: OMG! Aren't you Leonard Hofstadter?
Leonard: Yeah.
Dave: I saw you speak at Stanford with Sheldon Cooper! Amy, can you believe it? It's Dr. Leonard Hofstadter!
Amy: No. Pinch me.
Dave: It's an absolute pleasure to meet you. Can I shake your hand?
Leonard: I don't know if you want to do that, I was just-
Okay, never mind.
Dave: Amy, I'm never washing this hand again.
Leonard: You really should.

Raj: 60 seconds. This is not looking good.
Sheldon: One minute is a long time.
Howard: I've been telling women that for 20 years.

Sheldon: What if it's Jennifer Lawrence?
Howard: What?
Sheldon: Oh, that last Hunger Games was not my cup of tea.
Howard: You thought she was great in X-Men.
Sheldon: Oh, fine. I won't shut my heart to the love of Jennifer Lawrence.

Howard: Maybe she's waiting to show up at the last possible moment.
Sheldon: Ugh, sounds like a drama queen. Oh, no. It is Jennifer Lawrence.

Amy: We were on a date. Very much like this one.
Dave: Mmm, I doubt it was like this one. I mean, he's a genius, and I wasn't even smart enough to figure out why my wife always smelled of croissants.

Raj: 37 minutes left until the deadline.
Sheldon: Someone will show.
Howard: And no matter what happens, this is still a fun experiment.
Raj: Not as fun as the night we blew up grapes in the microwave. We really have led full lives.