Amy: Then I met Sheldon and look at where we are now.
Raj: You've kissed like once in three years.
Amy: That's true. Do whatever you want.

Penny: I don't want five dollars, I want my dignity.
Amy: So, what are we talking, like ten bucks?

Leonard: Sorry.
Amy: So, are you off to dinner with Priya, Howard and Bernadette?
Leonard: Yeah. How did you know?
Amy: I heard it at the mall, when I was shopping with my girlfriends, 'cause, you know, that's kind of my life now. Have a good night. Try not to ogle my caboose as I walk away.

Amy: I have a lab full of coked up monkeys with nothing to lose.

Amy: *Signs Amy Farrah Fowler on the iPad* Why yes, I would like to take a survey.

Penny: What are you working on?
Sheldon: Can't talk. In the zone.
Penny: (To Amy) Do you know what he's doing?
Amy: Could be anything. Last time he was like this he figured out electron transport in graphene. The time before that he was making a list of who's allowed in his tree fort if he ever gets one. Still can't believe I didn't make the cut.

Amy: Travel makes me constipated so I am the ideal hotel roommate.

Amy: I must take responsibility, I had to stop for feminine hygiene supplies.
Leonard, Raj, Wolowitz: Oh, oh, ok.
Sheldon: I believe she's experiencing her menses.
Amy: Actually, I'm not. In order to avoid surprises, I wear them all the time.

Amy: Hi, Dave. Uh, it's Amy.
Dave: Oh. How are you?
Amy: I'm fine. How are you?
Dave: Terrific. And pleasantly surprised to hear from you, given how I acted on our last date.
Amy: Yeah, well, we both made mistakes, you know. I took the last breadstick, you gushed over my ex-boyfriend like he was Leonard Nimoy and you were my ex-boyfriend.

Amy: You're all wasting your time. Sheldon is the most qualified for the job. And no amount of gravity-defying bosom is going to change that.

Sheldon: Uh-oh.
Amy: What?
Sheldon: I left the food out.
Amy: You afraid it's gonna go good?

Amy: I'm suddenly feeling flushed. My heart rate is elevated, my palms are clammy, my mouth is dry. In addition, I keep involuntarily saying hoo.
Penny: Oh, we know what's causing that, don't we?
Amy: It's no mystery. I obviously have the flu coupled with sudden-onset Tourette's syndrome.

Penny: So, Bert, you were telling us how you updated your profile?
Bert: Right. I wasn't getting any responses, and then I added, "Recent $625,000 MacArthur grant winner", and five minutes later, I met my soul mate.
*Amy goes to the hallway*
Amy: I was wrong. You can come back in.

Amy: Since we're live, you'll finally be able to reach out to us with your flag thoughts and flag questions.
Sheldon: Allow us to answer a few quick ones that we get all the time. Uh, yes, I really am a doctor. Uh, yes, she really is my girlfriend.
Amy: No, I just blink a lot, it's not Morse code for "rescue me."

Penny: We watch movies with director's commentary.
Amy: Oh, my favorite. George Lucas can talk through the entire movie but I say one word and I'm banished to the kitchen.