Raj: Come on! You know I can't talk to women unless I'm lit up like the Hindu festival of Diwali.

Raj: Who died and made you the king of moments?

Raj: I couldn't find you guys, so I bought six new friends! Sadly, three of them are dead.

Bernadette: So how come you two (Leonard & Raj) didn't move in together?
Leonard: This guy wanted a place of his own because he was sure he was going to be a ladies' man.
Raj: Yeah, I was wrong.

Raj: Cinnamon, she gave me her phone number! If I'd known it was that easy, I'd have considered poisoning you months ago.

Lakshmi: I'm gay.
Raj: Like dude-on-dude but with women?

Leonard: Wow, Raj, you were not lying about her.
Raj: I told you she exists!

Raj: It's not part of my heart-warming and personal narrative, in which a humble boy from New Delhi overcame poverty and prejudice and journeyed to America to reach for the stars.
Howard: Poverty? Your father's a gynaecologist. He drives a Bentley.
Raj: It's a lease.

Bernadette: Sorry I flipped out on you. I think it's just hormones.
Raj: I think you were mean before you were pregnant, but it's fine.

Raj: It wasn't a pajama party. It was just a couple of bros hanging out, giggling, eating cookie dough and watching Princess Bride.
Howard: Please stop talking.
Raj: As you wish.

Raj: I took the liberty of burning us a mix of heroic questing music.
Sheldon: This says Beyonce Bootylicious Dance Mix.
Raj: It's a re-writable CD. Just put it in.
Howard: Beyonce? Really?
Raj: She's curvy and she owns it. I like that.

Raj: If anyone cares, I still have to pee.

Howard: I lived with her to save money.
Raj: Yeah, you didn't need to buy groceries because you were breast feeding.

Raj: Oh, beef, Im going to miss you so much. Do you know, at the Mumbai McDonald's, you can't get a Big Mac? All you can get is a Chicken Maharaja Mac. And the special sauce is curry, which in India, believe you me, is really not that special.

Leonard: It will be like our World of Warcraft party a few years ago when the neighbors called the cops on us.
Howard: They called the cops because of the smell. They thought we were dead.
Raj: We were badass back in the day.
Leonard: All right, let's do it.
Howard: 48 hours of Star Wars gaming.
Raj: It's on like Alderaan.