Raj: I met her at the planetarium a few days ago, and she invited me out for a drink.
Leonard: Oh, good for you. H-Hey, w-what's the Hindi word for "dog"?
Raj: Kutta.
Leonard: You kutta.
Raj: Bho.n, bho.n. (chuckles) That's Hindi for woof-woof.

Sheldon: You know, I also have a date tonight. But don't worry, it's not another woman. It's string theory.

Amy: Hi.
Sheldon: Hello.
Amy: What you doing?
Sheldon: Oh, taking another picture with my baby. Look how big he got!

Nell: Morning.
Raj: Good morning.
Nell: Aw, you didn't have to cook me breakfast. Well, I wasn't sure how I did last night, and I wanted to finish strong.
Nell: You don't need to worry. Last night was great.
Raj: Ah, well, you say that now, but wait until you taste this.
Nell: Oh, my God, this is amazing.
Raj: Which is why I keep an omelet pan in the trunk of my car.

Nell: My husband never cooked for me.
Raj: Oh, uh, y-you were married.
Nell: Yeah. Well, technically, I guess I still am.
Raj: Is that "technically," like, the paperwork hasn't gone through, or "technically," like, he's in the closet watching us right now?

Raj: Yeah, do you mind me asking what he does for a living?
Nell: He's a firefighter.
Raj: Oh. Interesting. A potentially jealous man who's handy with an ax. It's-it's okay, though. He's almost had two weeks to cool down.

Leonard: And what are the side effects?
Penny: Oh, shoot, shoot.
Leonard: Mm, remember the mnemonic.
Penny: Ah. GRAVY, yes. G-R-A-V-Y. Okay, gastric distress, redness, anal leakage, vasculitis and yellow eyes.
Leonard: Oh, uh, so close. It's actually yellow discharge.
Penny: Oh, right. That's why we went with "gravy."

Penny: He knows he doesn't live here anymore, right?
Leonard: Maybe he's experiencing memory loss because he took...
Penny: Flaxitrite!
Leonard: Yeah.

Leonard: Uh, Sheldon, what are you doing?
Sheldon: Oh, I was just checking in on my old room to see what you've done with it.
Penny: Why?
Sheldon: Well, I could use a place to work in the evenings, and-
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: Well, it's just that there's not a lot of space in our apartment-
Penny: No.
Sheldon: Well, and I feel like Amy's been having-
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: And since you're not-
Penny: No.
Sheldon: It's-
Leonard: No.
Penny: (Sheldon starts to speak) No.
Leonard: That is our room now, and we're gonna turn it into a gym.
Sheldon: Do you really expect me to believe that?
Leonard: No.
Penny: No.

Raj: So I guess what's bugging me is that they only broke up 13 days ago, and now I'm dating her. So, am I, like, the good guy in my movie, or the bad guy in their movie?
Bernadette: Pretty sure you're the weird friend in our movie.

Raj: I like her, okay? I just, I-I don't know how I feel about being the third wheel in a relationship.
Howard: Says the guy in my bed with my wife.

Raj: Guys, I mean, he's around, okay? He's apparently not happy about the breakup, and based on the sweatpants he left at her place, he's, like, a medium to large man.
Howard: Maybe those are his "after the holiday" pants, like you have.

Raj: I mean, do you think it's too soon for her to be dating? If you and Bernadette broke up, like, how long would you wait?
Howard: Oh, well, I don't even want to think-
Bernadette: Eight days.
Howard: What?
Bernadette: Two days to cry. Six days to hit the gym.
Howard: First of all, you already look amazing.
Bernadette: Aw, that's sweet.
Howard: I'm gonna give him an extra day of crying.

Leonard: (on the phone) The answer is still no. You can say we wouldn't know you're here, but we'd know. Because you'd be here! (groans)
Penny: So, who was that?

Sheldon: I can't believe you hung up on me!
Leonard: What the hell? What are you doing here?
Sheldon: I am proving you wrong. I've been working back there for hours. You had no idea.