Amy: Do you want to go back to the apartment and see me try on my dress?
Sheldon: Shouldn't I see it for the first time at the Nobel ceremony?
Amy: It's not a wedding.
Sheldon: Okay. Well, give me a minute to think of another reason I don't want to see it.

Penny: Pickled herring. Who knew how good it was!
Leonard: Really? Sounds gross.
Penny: Looks gross. Smells gross. It's delicious! [knock on door] Ooh, that might be my salted cod!

Sheldon: "Your majesties, members of the Nobel Academy. When I was a young boy growing up in East Texas I always knew I'd wind up on this stage, and everybody who said I wouldn't looks pretty darn foolish right now. I'm talking about you, high school science teacher Mr. Hubert Givens."
Amy: Sheldon, Sheldon. Why are you talking so fast?
Sheldon: I'm trying to get my speech down to 90 minutes.
Amy: Nobody's gonna be able to understand a word you're saying.
Sheldon: Welcome to my life.

Sheldon: As such, your behavior must reflect the highest standards. Uh, Raj. Bagel down.
Raj: If my blood sugar drops and I get bitchy, it's on you.

Leonard: How long is it gonna take you to get ready?
Penny: Oh, I just need, like, five or ten minutes.
Leonard: Really?
Penny: No. What is wrong with you?!

Sarah Michelle Gellar: Just to be clear, this isn't a date.
Raj: Yeah, I know.
Sarah Michelle Gellar: Then why are you holding my hand?

Leonard: Excuse me, but if I recall, you're the one who went out drinking with Sheldon, then came home and attacked me.
Penny: Attacked you? I said, "Do you wanna?"
Leonard: Yeah. I was helpless.
Penny: Uh-huh.
Leonard: So do you wanna?
Penny: Well, I can't get more pregnant.
Leonard: Mm-hmm. We'll see about that.

Leonard: You pick up your dresses?
Amy: Yep. The tailor had to take mine in and let Penny's out. Best day of my life.
Sheldon: What about the day you met me?
Amy: I stand by my statement.

Bernadette: Howard, the kids are okay.
Howard: How do you know that?
Bernadette: I just know. A mother knows.
Howard: So what, now the Force is with you?
Bernadette: Let's see. This is not the woman you want to annoy.

Sheldon: All right, bagels down. Before we head to the airport, I'd like to go over a few things.
[others groan]
Sheldon: From the moment we step off the plane, each and every one of you is an ambassador for Amy and myself.
Howard: [to Bernadette] I told you these tickets weren't free.

Howard: Oh, good, you're here. Listen, we're thinking maybe we should go back to L.A.
Amy: Why?
Howard: We just can't be this far away from the kids. Bernie's having a meltdown, and, frankly, so am I.
Sheldon: Yeah, well, pull it together. This is a big day for me.
Howard: [scoffs] Yeah, I wasn't sure what to do. Now I am. We're going home.
Leonard: We'll join you.
Penny: Oh, wait. Do I get a vote in this?
Leonard: They'll have pickled herring on the plane.
Penny: Bye-bye.

Bernadette: Now, Michael, Mommy and Daddy are going away for a couple days, so if you're gonna say your first words, you got to do it now or wait till we get back.

Sheldon: All right, well, we should head out now if we're gonna get to the airport six hours before boarding.

Leonard: What?
Amy: Sheldon has something he'd like to say.
Sheldon: I'm sorry I didn't react appropriately. You and Penny are bringing new life into the world. Congratulations. I can't wait to meet it.
Leonard: "It"?
Sheldon: That's a gender-neutral pronoun. If you're offended, take it up with the English language.

Howard: Somebody just peed in the big girl potty.
Bernadette: Oh, I'm so proud! It was her, right?
Howard: Yes.