Bernadette: What do you think you're doing?
Amy: I thought it was clear. I'm being unnecessarily hurtful but with a sweet voice.
Sheldon: And I don't understand what's going on because I went to MIT.

Leonard: Okay, guys, I think that's enough.
Raj: Hold on. I'm the judge here, and I'm going to allow it.
Penny: Raj, take a break.
Anu: Hey, free speech. Right back there somewhere.

Howard: You know what, guys? You got us. Congratulations. Now why don't you go back to your apartment and put on your other costumes.
Amy: Oh, but it's so far away, and I have such teeny, tiny legs.

Bert: I don't get invited to a lot of parties. Is this a good one?
Stuart: Oh, yeah.

Amy: Maybe Howard could apologize?
Bernadette: You're kidding, right? Sheldon didn't apologize when he said my baby looked like Winston Churchill.
Amy: He loves Churchill. Your son should take that as a compliment.
Bernadette: He said it about my daughter.

Bernadette: How many times has he made fun of Howard for being an engineer? Going to MIT? His magic?
Amy: Sheldon doesn't make fun of his magic.
Bernadette: Well, he should. It's stupid.

Bernadette: Anyway, the point is, Sheldon shouldn't dish it out if he can't take it.
Amy: I think the point is that Howard owes him an apology.
Bernadette: Yeah, well, I think the point is if Sheldon has a problem with Howard, Sheldon should take it up with him. Now, if you'll excuse me, the prime minister of England needs her diaper changed.

Leonard: Oh, that's great. He's a Supreme Court justice, and you're the U.S. Constitution.
Anu: Yep. He interprets me. And guess what's underneath this? The Bill of Tights.

Bernadette: Hey, Bert, what are you dressed as?
Bert: I'll give you a hint. My work in seismic refraction measurements and-
Bernadette: Hey, Stuart, what are you dressed as?
Stuart: I'm a butterfly.
Bernadette: Did you steal those from Halley's "let's pretend" box?
Stuart: I'm gonna put them back.

Bert: All right, I'll tell you. I'm Maurice "Doc" Ewing, winner of the 1960 Vetlesen Prize, generally regarded as the Nobel Prize of geology.
Bernadette: Oh, yeah. Now I see it.
Bert: Ask me how I died. Spoiler alert: brain hemorrhage.

Howard: (imitating Dick Van Dyke's cockney accent) Well, Gorblimey. You look like a thousand tuppence. Don't he, Mary Poppins?
Bert: Are you gonna talk like that all night?
Howard: Jiff willikers, I am.
Bernadette: Isn't he cute? He's gonna get a spoonful of sugar later.
Howard: And I'm gonna sweep Ms. Poppins' chimney.

Leonard: So, here we are. On Halloween. On this couch. Does it ring any bells?
Penny: Really? We're still doing this?
Leonard: I'm just surprised you don't remember our first kiss.
Penny: (sighs) Fine. It was on Halloween.
Leonard: Are you agreeing just to shut me up?
Penny: You got another way? I'm all ears.

Bert: Really? An arranged marriage?
Raj: Yeah. I know how it sounds.
Bert: It sounds awesome. Is that just an Indian thing, or can I get a piece of that?
Anu: You know the woman has a choice, right?
Bert: There's always a catch.

Amy: Hey, why aren't you in your costume?
Sheldon: I just didn't feel like it.
Amy: You get that I'm wearing a corset because of you, not because I'm tired of breathing?

Sheldon: Amy, do you think I'm always correcting other people?
Amy: No, not all the time. I mean, just last week, Penny ended a sentence with a preposition. You didn't even mention it.
Sheldon: True. I just waited until I got home and screamed into a pillow.