Penny: Oh, they're all up there, huh? Hmm, typical.
Sheldon: It's axiomatically atypical. Up until recently, they did not know Alicia, and had no encounters with her in a previous location. They never went upstairs to visit the former tenants, so your characterization of their behavior as typical Is demonstrably fallacious.
Penny: Okay, now I see the giant squid head.

Howard: Yeah, I thought about renting this apartment, but I'm really more of a downtown loft kind of guy.
Alicia: Cool. So are you in a loft now?
Howard: Oh, actually I'm, uh, living with a woman in Altadena. Purely platonic, she's also my maid.
Alicia: Sounds like a sweet deal.
Howard: I won't lie, it's pretty dope.

Penny: Is Leonard around?
Sheldon: He's upstairs at Alicias.
Penny: Oh. all right, that's cool, no biggie. He said he'd help me set up my printer, but I guess I can wait. What exactly is he doing up there?
Sheldon: In what I can only perceive as a tactical move to destroy me, he is with Wolowitz and Koothrappali setting up her stereo.

Sheldon: You know, Penny, there's something that occurs in beehives you might find interesting. Occasionally, a new queen will arrive while the old queen is still in power. When this happens, the old queen must either locate to a new hive or engage in a battle to the death until only one queen remains.
Penny: What are you saying, that I'm threatened by Alicia? That I'm like the old queen of the hive and it's just time for me to go?
Sheldon: I'm just talking about bees. They're on the Discovery Channel. What are you talking about?
Penny: Bees.

Leonard: Hey, Penny. this is Alicia, our new neighbor.
Penny: Hi.
Alicia: Hi.
Leonard: I'm helping.
Penny: I can see.
Sheldon: Alicia's non-musical, childless and pro-rug. She's still on probation, of course, but I like her.

Alicia: Cool t-shirt.
Penny: Oh, yeah, I don't usually dress like this. I'm going jogging.
Sheldon: You don't jog.
Penny: I can start.
Sheldon: True, but the more likely explanation for your attire is that you're out of clean clothes again.
Penny: Thank you, Sheldon.
Sheldon: You're welcome, Penny.

Sheldon: Congratulations, I see you did your laundry.
Penny: Well, sort of.
Sheldon: How does one sort of-
Penny: I bought new clothes, okay?

Leonard: Sheldon...
Sheldon: Hang on. Are you now or have you ever been a salsa, Irish folk or break-dancer?
Alicia: No.
Leonard: You're making her uncomfortable.
Sheldon: Oh, I'm sorry. Well, if it helps you feel any better you're doing very well so far. Next question, are you fertile?
Alicia: What?!
Sheldon: I'm trying to determine whether crying infants above my head are a possibility.
Alicia: I have no immediate plans.
Sheldon: If that changes, let me know. And finally, area rugs, pro or con?
Alicia: Pro?
Sheldon: Alicia?
Alicia: Yes?
Sheldon: Welcome to the building.

Sheldon: Hello. On a scale of one to ten how light of foot would you describe yourself with one being not cat-like at all and ten being freakishly feline?
Alicia: Freakishly feline?
Sheldon: Is that your answer or do you not understand the question? We'll come back to that one.

Penny: Okay, new topic, please. Hey, did you hear the people upstairs in 5A are moving out?
Leonard: Shh-shh-shh!
Sheldon: What?
Penny: The people upstairs are moving out.
Leonard: No!
Sheldon: The horror!
Leonard: Why would you just say something like that?
Sheldon: No, no, no, no, no, no, no-
Penny: How else was I supposed to say it?
Leonard: Slowly, like putting a new fish in a tank. You dont just drop it in, you let the bag sit in the water a while.

Alicia: I'm Alicia. I'm moving in upstairs.
Leonard: That is so great. Oh, I'm Leonard, I live downstairs. Upstairs from here, but under you. Not under you per se, but under your apartment.
Alicia: That's nice.
Leonard: Yeah, it is.
Sheldon: If that concludes your faltering attempt to mate, hello.

Howard: And did you know the word "pumpernickel" comes from the German words pumper and nickel, which loosely translates to fart goblin?

Sheldon: You're holding a Japanese puzzle box, which takes ten precise moves to open. First, locate the panel with the diamond pattern and slide the centre portion one millimetre to the left. Then, on the opposite end of the box, slide the entire panel down two millimetres. You'll hear a slight click.
Penny: Hang on. Sheldon, do you have any emotional attachment to this box?
Sheldon: No, it's a novelty I ordered off the Internet. Now, did you hear the click?
Penny: Not yet. (Puts the box on the ground and stomps on it)There it is.

Sheldon: So, I'm thinking, you won the Nobel Prize what, three years ago? So you must deal with a whole lot of what has Smoot done lately? My thought is we continue my research as a team, you know, Cooper-Smoot, alphabetical, and when we win the Nobel Prize, you'll be back on top.
George Smoot: With all due respect, Dr. Cooper, are you on crack?
Sheldon: Fine! Smoot-Cooper. Wow, what a diva.

Sheldon: Yes, I'm still here. Where am I going? I'm on a train. Now, what you'll be looking for is a small wooden box located between a Hoberman's sphere and a sample of quartz flecked with pyrite. Hoberman's Sphere. It's a collapsible icosidodecahedron. No, the thing with the time on it is my alarm clock.