Penny: Well, that, that's good. I'm glad you came to that. But before you do, let me just ask you a big picture question.
Bernadette: What?
Penny: Are you a hundred percent positive you love and want to marry Howard Wolowitz?
Bernadette: I do, with all my heart.
Penny: Got it. Just had to check.

Leonard: Hey, Sheldon?
Sheldon: Oh, good. You picked me, you picked me.
Leonard: No, I just got a text from Stuart. Brent Spiner is at the party.
Sheldon: Brent Spiner?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: I don't care.
Leonard: Really? Brent Spiner, Mr. Data himself. You love him.
Sheldon: I did, but I think I've kind of outgrown Star Trek. You know, stock characters, ludicrous plots, beam me up. What a load of hooey.
Leonard: I'm going. Live long and prosper, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Yeah, even that. You look like a dork.

Howard: If you're gonna love me, you're gonna have to love the whole package, the tenderhearted poet and the crazy daredevil.
Bernadette: I know.
Howard: Well, don't say it if you're not gonna mean it, 'cause I'm not just gonna stop with the space station. Yeah, I want to go to the Moon, I want to go to Mars. I want to take a one-man sub to the lowest depths of the ocean.
Bernadette: Really? You got seasick on Pirates of the Caribbean.
Howard: Well, those big kids were rocking it.

Bernadette: I just did what I did because I love you so much, and the thought of losing you is more than I can handle.
Howard: Really?
Bernadette: You're my soul mate. This is where you kiss me.

Leonard: What are you doing here?
Sheldon: Fighting for our friendship. As peculiar and annoying as you can be, you're still my little buddy. I'm not going to let that end here tonight. Now put down that drink, let's meet Brent Spiner and go home.

Wil Wheaton: Hey, Sheldon, I'm so glad you made it. I found something I think you might like.
Sheldon: What I'd like is for him to have a more depressing home. This is quite lovely.

Wil Wheaton: This is for you.
Sheldon: An original mint-in-package Wesley Crusher action figure.
Wil Wheaton: I remembered your story about the time you went to a convention when you were a kid to get one signed, and I didn't show up.
Wil Wheaton: Look at what I wrote.
Sheldon: To Sheldon, sorry this took so long. Your friend, Wil Wheaton.
Wil Wheaton: It's my last one. I want you to have it.
Sheldon: Look, everyone. Wil Wheaton is my friend!

Leonard: Can we get autographed dolls?
Brent Spiner: Sure. Twenty bucks.
Leonard: Ten.
Brent Spiner: Eighteen.
Leonard: Twelve.
Brent Spiner: Sixteen.
Leonard: Two for thirty. And you come to my birthday party.
Brent Spiner: Done.

Sheldon: Come on out, merry pranksters. Take a bow!

Leonard: Oh. Watch out, Sheldon. This little boy Casper is a g-g-g-ghost!
Sheldon: Droll.
Howard: Not as droll as a grown man passed out in a puddle of his own urine.
Leonard: That was pretty droll. With a hint of ammonia.

Penny: So, Bernadette, how goes the hunt for bridesmaid dresses?
Bernadette: Well, if you dont mind looking like an orange traffic cone, great.

Amy: Girlfriends, I have the answer to our dress problems.
Bernadette: Really?
Amy: Twelve years ago, my cousin Irene and her entire family died in a horrific carbon monoxide accident the night before her wedding.
Bernadette: That's horrible.
Amy: Yes and no. All those bridesmaids dresses remain unused and available to us for free. So it seems that cloud of odourless deadly gas had a silver lining after all. Check it out, still in the bags. The gowns, not the bridesmaids.

Bernadette: I dont know. Dead people's dresses?
Penny: Yeah, and cap sleeves?
Amy: I was hoping you wouldn't notice. Irene was always a slave to a good bargain when it came to clothes, and sadly as it turned out, space heaters.

Sheldon: Ladies, please. These four walls once housed an intellectual salon where the mind received nourishment as well as the stomach. But through no one's fault, Penny, the quality of dinner conversation in this apartment has declined. And again, I'm looking at no one in particular, Penny.
Leonard: Fine. What would you like to talk about, Sheldon?
Howard: "What would you like to talk about, Sheldon?" Why do you hate us?
Sheldon: I've prepared a number of topics that should appeal to both the advanced and novice conversationalists.
Penny: Okay, that time you looked at me.

Sheldon: Topic one. Faster-than-light particles at CERN, paradigm-shifting discovery or another Swiss export as full of holes as their cheese? And converse.