Leonard: We might want to live together.
Sheldon: Oh. Well, I've already given this some thought. And I'm willing to let Penny live with us, one day a week for a trial period. Now, obviously not when she's made cranky by the shedding of her uterine lining.

Leonard: So, listen. There was something I was hoping to float past you. Now that Penny and I are engaged, I thought we might want to talk about our living arrangements.
Sheldon: Of course. She's spent many nights here, and you're worried about preserving the myth of her virginity before the wedding.
Leonard: I'm not.
Sheldon: Good. Because not only has that ship sailed, if it hit an iceberg countless men would perish.

Amy: Here, I made you some Strawberry Quik.
Sheldon: I have real problems here, Amy. I can't be mollified with a beverage designed for children. *Takes a sip* Mmm, yummy.

Sheldon: I see. You're putting your future bride's happiness above mine.
Leonard: Well, yeah!
Sheldon: Wow.

Leonard: Maybe I'll move in with Penny, or maybe she and I'll take this place and you can move across the hall.
Sheldon: Move across the hall?! Did you take a marijuana?

Bernadette: You're not working. How'd you like a job in home healthcare?
Penny: Not a chance.
Bernadette: Please, I'm desperate.
Penny: No.
Bernadette: I'll pay anything you want.
Penny: Okay then, yeah.

Bernadette: Little warning before you jump into this marriage business. You're not just marrying him, you're marrying his family.
Penny: I think Leonard's mom's okay with me.
Bernadette: It doesn't matter if she's okay with you. The question is can she go to the bathroom by herself?

Bernadette: Sorry, I'm late. The leaf blower broke so I had to hand dry my mother-in-law.

Sheldon: I'm writing an appeal to the faculty senate so that I can move on from string theory.
Leonard: How's it going?
Sheldon: You tell me. "Dear esteemed colleagues. As you may know, I have requested to change my field of study. My decision to do so is, I believe, in the best interest of science. At your convenience, I'd be happy to explain it to you in words you'll understand."

Leonard: It's nice that you called them esteemed.
Sheldon: You're right, I'll take that out.

Leonard: I'm your son. What about the fact that she's good enough for me?
Beverly Hofstadter: *blank shrug* Sure.

Beverly Hofstadter: Let me save you all of your hemming and hawing. Sheldon already told me that you and Penny are engaged.
Leonard: I hate that you talk to him more than you talk to me.
Beverly Hofstadter: Would you like for me and you to talk more?
Leonard: You know, it's probably fine.

Beverly Hofstadter: In any event, while I've had my misconceptions about *Penny*, Sheldon spoke very fondly of her. And if she is good enough for him, then she's good enough for me.

Beverly Hofstadter: Leonard, would it make you feel better to hear that your mother approved of your life choices?
Leonard: Yes, it would.
Beverly Hofstadter: Yeah. Well, you should work on that.

Beverly Hofstadter: Hello, Leonard.
Leonard: Hi, mom. I have some exciting news.
Beverly Hofstadter: I'm listening.
Leonard: Before I tell you, will you promise to try and be happy for me and keep any concerns you have to yourself?
Beverly Hofstadter: No.