Amy: You got me something?
Sheldon: Oh. Not just something. It's from the heart, it's holiday-themed, and I swallowed the gift receipt so you can not return it.

Amy: Well, you got me something. Here.
Sheldon: Cookies?
Amy: They're your MeeMaw's Christmas cookies. I called and got the recipe.
Sheldon: They're perfect. It tastes like her hugs.
Amy: Merry Christmas, Sheldon.
Sheldon: I can't believe this. You're happy. I'm happy. Maybe a holiday that's all about giving isn't so - Get your hand out of that box!

Raj: If you people think this is better than Tom Hanks-Giving, you're all crazy.

Dr. Koothrappali: I see you got engaged.
Penny: Yes, we did.
Dr. Koothrappali: Let me tell you a story.
Raj: Dad.
Dr. Koothrappali: Sorry. I'm sure you won't grow to hate each other.

Sheldon: The truth is, I can no longer balance a full time career, a popular Internet show, and a girlfriend.
Amy: And he really does have one, you jerks on the comment board.

Amy: After only 232 episodes.
Sheldon: 233 if we include the one somebody forgot to press record on.
Amy: You said you weren't going to bring that up.
Sheldon: And you said you pressed record.

Raj: You know, I thought cleaning out a dead professor's office was gonna just be boring, but then I found his dentures and realized it's also gross.

Howard: Don't feel bad. Some day someone will be throwing out your work, too.
Leonard: That someone was Sheldon and the day was yesterday.

Penny: Bernadette's just parking the car.
Dan: Oh good. Bernadette. Cute, sweet, vicious, little Bernadette.

Penny: Come on, she's not that bad.
Dan: Oh, yeah? At the company picnic she yelled at me and my grandson for losing the three-legged race. He still calls her that mean kid with the big boobies.

Sheldon: Here at Fun with Flags we've had an opportunity to learn, laugh, wonder.
Amy: And, yes, even shed a tear or two.
Sheldon: Like when you do a two-hour Fourth of July spectacular and it doesn't even get recorded.
Amy: How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?
Sheldon: How about four thousand? One for every domino I set up for that American Flag.

Raj: When stuff like this gets me down, you know what I like to do?
Howard: Sing Hakuna Matata like an eight-year-old girl?
Raj: Wrong, smarty pants. It's "Everything is Awesome" from the Lego Movie.

Bernadette: It just builds character. Like my dad said, "Nobody likes a cry baby but their moms and Democrats."

LeVar Burton: Thank you, Sheldon, now remember our deal.
Sheldon: You do this, I delete your contact information.
LeVar Burton: While...?
Sheldon: While you watch me do it.

Professor Sharp: To be honest, his research never amounted to anything.
Raj: You were his colleague. How did your research turn out?
Professor Sharp: Great! This is the apartment you get when you win a Nobel.
Raj: You could be very frugal. I'm getting a little tired of everybody's sarcasm.