Sheldon: If I could, I would run each and every one of you viewers up a flag pole and salute you. And if you touch the ground, burn you.

Sheldon: I'd like to take a moment to personally thank Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler, who you may or may not know is the first woman to co-host a flag or banner related Internet infotainment show.
Amy: Take that glass ceiling!

Sheldon: And if I may get serious for a moment. Hosting this show has been one crazy ride. With all its up and downs, I wouldn't give it up for the world. Except for now, when I'm giving it up.

Amy: Sheldon, that was beautiful.
Sheldon: If you didn't press record-
Amy: I pressed it!

Leonard: Well, that's it. It's the end of Roger Abbott.
Raj: And we still don't know who framed him.

Howard: I guess the sad truth is not everyone will accomplish something great. Some of us may just have to find meaning in the little moments that make up life.
Leonard: That's a nice way of looking at it.
Howard: Yeah, for you, not for me. I went to space, so I'm covered.

Leonard: You know what, this bottle was meant to celebrate an achievement. Let's make a pact. When one of us gets their first big breakthrough, we'll celebrate by opening this bottle and toasting Professor Abbott.
Howard: I love that.
Raj: Me too.
Leonard: Then, of course, rubbing our success in Sheldon's face.
Howard: Well that's the best part.

Bernadette: Penny told me that everyone's scared of me.
Dan: What? Why would she say that? You know she drinks, right?

Dan: Well one thing I've been meaning to tell you, is that the company's gonna stop paying for our coffee.
Bernadette: No problem. When does that start?
Dan: Five months ago.
Bernadette: What? Who's been paying for my coffee.
Dan: All of us.
Penny: Yep, it comes from the swear jar we put money in when you curse.

Bernadette: I thought everybody liked me, but I'm just a monster.
Dan: But a cute one. Like that eyeball guy in Monsters Inc.

Sheldon: It's not the same thing. I don't think you know how I feel at all.
Leonard: Sad?
Sheldon: Hmm, you do get me.

LeVar Burton: Wil Wheaton said get a gate. I don't know why I didn't get a gate.

Amy: This is an easy one. You love this guy.
Sheldon: Me.
Amy: Come on. He's an under appreciated genius.
Sheldon: Still think it's me.
Amy: It's not you. Now think, there's a car named after him.
Sheldon: Of course there is. The Mini Cooper because it's me.
Amy: How about this? He's a poor man's Sheldon Cooper.
Sheldon: Oh, Tesla.

Sheldon: Why would you have surgery?
Leonard: Because I can't breathe. I snore. I get sinus infections.
Penny: Back off, he's all mine.

Sheldon: I've learned that 1 in 700,000 people die from general anesthesia.
Leonard: But do you realize that means 699,999 people don't die?
Sheldon: I suppose that's true. You're such a glass half full kind of guy. I'm going to miss that.