Meemaw: Young lady, if you think I don't know what it's like to live with a stubborn, egotistical man, then you're wrong. 'Cause that was my husband.
Amy: Really?
Meemaw: There were days I wanted to fill his pockets with corn and toss him in the pigpen.

Amy: Look, I know you think I'm not right for Sheldon, but trust me, I'm his best shot. You have no idea how much I put up with!
Meemaw: I know more than you think I do.
Amy: Really? You know what it's like to have date night ruined because Google changed their font?

Sheldon: I always looked up to you and Pop-Pop. I know what a challenging man he could be, but I saw you stand by him and make him into a better person.
Meemaw: I did.
Sheldon: Yeah, well, that is exactly what I've been doing the last five years with this little work in progress.
Leonard: He never disappoints, does he?

Penny: Hi. Sorry. Sheldon would like to say something to you.
Sheldon: No, I wouldn't.
Leonard: Just get in here.
Sheldon: Hello.
Penny: Go ahead.
Sheldon: Meemaw, look, I'm sorry, but I have to defend my girlfriend to you.
Amy: Oh, Sheldon, thank you.
Sheldon: Oh, great, now you're gonna get emotional. (hands Amy a tissue from Meemaw's sleeve)

Amy: Well, if you understand, then why are you giving me such a hard time?
Meemaw: Because when you broke up with Sheldon, it hurt him deeply, and I don't want to see that happen again.

Raj: Okay, we did have a vibe. This is exciting. What's my next move?
Bernadette: You still have a girlfriend.
Raj: Right. Good catch.

Raj: So, uh, we're meeting for coffee like two adults. Everybody's happy. Easy peasy.
Bernadette: Are you gonna tell Emily?
Raj: Yeah, of course. We have no secrets.
Howard: When are you gonna tell Emily?
Raj: He lied about the cream cheese! He ate the whole thing! I saw him!

Raj: Anyway, so I'm sorry to waste your time. And, uh and good luck with your screenplay.
Claire: Hang on. We're both adults. We can still get together without it meaning anything.
Raj: Not me. Ever since you admitted we had a vibe, I've been planning our wedding.
Claire: Look, it's just coffee. I'll ask you some questions about science, and if you propose, I promise to say no.
Raj: Okay. That hurts a little, but okay.

Raj: All right. I've made up my mind. I'm gonna do the right thing, call this girl, and let her know that I'm in a relationship.
Howard: Okay, so far we've heard, "Made up my mind, I'm dumping Emily."
Bernadette: "Made up my mind to date both of them by pretending to be twin brothers."
Howard: And "Made up my mind, 'll ask for a threesome and if they say no, play it off as a joke."
Raj: I'm calling her. And the threesome didn't deserve the belly laugh it got.
Bernadette: You're right. It could totally happen. (laughing)

Penny: What happened? Is Amy gone?
Sheldon: No. They asked me to leave so they could speak privately.
Penny: Uh oh.
Sheldon: Yeah, I know. It was quite tense. So here's the million dollar question. Uh, who wants to pop over there and get my trains?

Penny: Wow. The last time I saw my grandma, the most exciting thing was watching the ash of her cigarette get longer and wondering if it was gonna fall in her pudding.
Leonard: Did it?
Penny: Yeah, right in there. She ate it and everything.

Raj: Hey, it's not my fault if American women project their fantasies on foreigners with the kind of magical voice that grants wishes.

Bernadette: The real question is, where are you with Emily?
Raj: Uh, it's hard to say. I think we're good, but things like this make me wonder if Emily's really the right person for me. I mean, did you guys ever have doubts about each other?
Howard: No. Never.
Bernadette: Absolutely.
Howard: What?
Bernadette: Howie, you forget how much of our early dates involved you doing magic and me doing this.
Howard: Fine. I had reservations about you, too.
Bernadette: No, you didn't.
Howard: No, I didn't.
Bernadette: Well, it doesn't matter now, 'cause I love how things worked out.
Howard: Me, too. And I think you're even more beautiful than this rose.

Meemaw: Let her go. And under no circumstance will you give her that engagement ring.
Amy: What ring?
Leonard: Maybe we should give them some privacy.
Penny: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You go ahead. I'll catch up with you.

Meemaw: Sheldon, tell this girl that my ring will never be on her finger.
Sheldon: Yeah, I'm gonna opt out of that one, too.