Leonard: Hey, did you ever think about the military applications for the guidance system?
Sheldon: Of course.
Leonard: Does it bother you?
Sheldon: No, it did at first. But then I talked it through with Frank and Alicia, and they really helped put things into perspective.
Leonard: Who are these people?
Sheldon: Leonard, friends are like toilet paper. It's good to have extras under the sink.

Raj: So, uh, what are you guys talking about?
Claire: Your friends were just telling me about all the other girls you're dating.
Raj: Why would you do that? I specifically asked you not to do that.
Penny: We didn't.
Amy: You just did.
Zack: Wow. Maybe none of you guys are smart.

Zack: Oh, man, I didn't mean to do that. But I do appreciate you recognizing my swimmer's body. Which, incidentally, I got from playing Marco Polo at the YMCA.

Raj: Yeah, okay, just do me a favor and stop talking about how great Claire is.
Zack: Anything for you, my little foreign friend.

Raj: Hey, dude, you're killing me with Claire.
Zack: What are you talking about?
Raj: I mean, come on, look at you. You're classically handsome, you've got a swimmer's body. Next to you, I look like me.

Sheldon: And any time you need a break from being Bernadette the Pregnant, Bernatrix the Warrior Queen is here waiting.
Bernadette: I might just take you up on that.
Sheldon: Well, mind you, now, that offer's only good until the third trimester. I can't risk getting amniotic fluid on my spot.

Claire: So, I got to ask, does Raj bring around other girls?
Penny: Uh, you know, I'm not really around that much. Amy knows much more than I do.
Leonard: I don't think you have anything to worry about. Raj is a terrific guy, loyal to a fault.
Howard: Yeah. He still has an AOL address.

Bernadette: Okay, I guess I should eat the Hell Prawn.
Sheldon: Using your sword, you prepare a beautiful sushi dinner. You slip into the hot spring and enjoy the warm water on your aching joints. As you happily close your eyes, you recall the incredible evening you've had and notice that your feet and ankles are smaller than they've ever been. The end.

Howard: Okay, then. Geez, how much wine did you drink?
Leonard: Not a lot. I just couldn't start until you walked away.

Bernadette: Wow, this night turned out to be so much more fun than I thought.
Sheldon: Oh, the fun doesn't stop. You're still going home with a goodie bag full of toast.

Bernadette: Thank you for this. You know, ever since people found out I'm having a baby, I feel like I became Pregnant Bernadette. It was nice to take a little break tonight.
Sheldon: I can understand that. From the moment people realized I was a genius, I've been Sheldon the Genius. Although I've never really wanted a break from that, so I suppose I don't understand. Which is ironic, 'cause, you know, genius.

Sheldon: The Hell Prawn lunges out of the hot spring. You block it with your shield. Do you attack?
Bernadette: Does it have eyes?
Sheldon: Three giant red ones and they never blink. It's unsettling.
Bernadette: I stab it in the middle eye.
Sheldon: Good choice. Critical hit. Your sword goes through its eye into its tiny brain. With its final dying gasp, it says, "You have reduced me to a pile of sushi. Enjoy me with this packet of soy sauce. Its low sodium. Aaaargh."

Zack: Boy, you get some dirty looks over there when you ask for ice.

(at the urinals)
Leonard: Maybe we should take a step back.
Howard: Take a step back? I'm not a young man any more.

Raj: Zack, this is my friend Claire.
Zack: You're hot. You seeing anybody?
Raj: Uh, she's seeing me.
Zack: Why'd you say she's your friend?
Raj: We're just keeping it casual.
Zack: Why is he being casual with you? You seem great.
Claire: I don't know. Ask him.
Zack: Why are you being casual with her? She seems great.