Sheldon Quotes Page 28 of 38

Searching Search quotes

Showing quotes 811 to 840 of 1129Sort by  popularity | date added | episode

Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Penny: Where are my clothes?
Sheldon: Your clothes?
Penny: Yes. I left them in the washers and when I went down to get them, they were gone.
Sheldon: Really? Despite the sign that says: "Do not leave laundry unattended?"

4.1

Quote from the episode The Zarnecki Incursion

Leonard:You called the police because someone hacked your "World of Warcraft" account?
Sheldon:What choice did I have? The mighty Sheldor, level 85 blood elf, hero of the Eastern Kingdoms, has been picked clean like a carcass is the desert sun. Plus the FBI hung up on me.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Benefactor Factor

Sheldon: It's not a touch phobia, it's a germ phobia. If you'd like to put on a pair of latex gloves I'll let you check me for a hernia.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Codpiece Topology

Sheldon: Look on the bright side.
Leonard: What's the bright side?
Sheldon: Only 9 more months to Comic-Con.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Launch Acceleration

Sheldon: There is only one mind expanding drug this man enjoys, and that's called school.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Dumpling Paradox

Sheldon: If we're all through playing "Mock the Flawed Technology", can we get on with Halo Night? We were supposed to start at 8, it is now 8:06.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Cooper-Hofstadter Polarization

Leonard: Okay, I'm going ask you one more time. We did the work together, let's present the paper together.
Sheldon: And I'm telling you for the last time, it's pandering, it's undignified, and bite me.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Thespian Catalyst

Sheldon: I sense that you're trying to slow walk me to an epiphany. Would you mind very much jumping to it.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Penny: I'm running really late (to work).
Sheldon: Then I have a simple solution: Go up to the roof, hop over to next building, there's a small gap, don't look if you suffer of vertigo, and use their stairwell.
Penny: You are joking, right?
Sheldon: Oh, I never joke when it comes to vertigo.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Loobenfeld Decay

Penny sing "Out Tonight"!
Leonard: What the hell is that?
Sheldon: I don't know, but if cats could sing ... they'd hate it too.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Toast Derivation

Sheldon: At one point Raj put on reggae music and his sister took off her shoes. It was like the last days of Caligula.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Roommate Transmogrification

Sheldon: Will you Boozehounds stop that infernal clinking? And the Answer was Elephant.

4

Quote from the episode The Bozeman Reaction

Sheldon: I'm fine. I'm no longer master of my own bladder.

4

Quote from the episode The Bad Fish Paradigm

Sheldon: Why don't you just take your clothes down to the river and beat them with a rock.

4

Quote from the episode The Barbarian Sublimation

Sheldon: Danger! Danger!

4

Quote from the episode The Adhesive Duck Deficiency

Sheldon: Let it never be said that Sheldon Lee Cooper ignored the pleas of a damsel in distress.

4

Quote from the episode The Staircase Implementation

TV Announcer: Up next Babylon 5.
(Sheldon looks at Leonard)
(Penny listening to Sheldon and Leonard argue from her apartment)
Leonard: You're not even watching it.
Sheldon: I can hear it.
Leonard: The dialogue offends you?

4

Quote from the episode The Cohabitation Formulation

Sheldon: While you're at it I am upset we have an unannounced house guest, so make me cocoa.

4

Quote from the episode The Precious Fragmentation

Sheldon: Give us the precious!

4

Quote from the episode The Peanut Reaction

Sheldon: The entire institution of gift giving makes no sense. Let's say that I go out and I spend 50 dollars on you. It's a laborious activity because I have to imagine what you need whereas you know what you need. Now I could simplify things, just give you the 50 dollars directly and then you could give me 50 dollars on my birthday and so on; until one of us dies leaving the other one old and 50 dollar richer and I ask you is, it worth it?

4

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Sheldon: Why don't you tell them I take tolls at the Golden Gate Bridge? A Rocket Scientist, how humiliating!

4

Quote from the episode The Creepy Candy Coating Corollary

Sheldon: Now Fetch Me Will Wheaton! (SPEAKING KLINGON)
Wil Wheaton: Did that guy just say, "Revenge is a dish best served cold," in Klingon?
Stuart: I believe so.
Wil Wheaton: What is wrong with him?
Stuart: Everyone has a different theory.

4

Quote from the episode The Dumpling Paradox

Penny: OK, I have a problem!
Sheldon: It's called carpal tunnel syndrome, and quite frankly, you deserve it.

4

Quote from the episode The Dumpling Paradox

Leonard: You have a TV in your room. Why don't you have breakfast in bed?
Sheldon: Because I am neither an invalid nor a woman celebrating Mother's Day.

4

Quote from the episode The Loobenfeld Decay

Sheldon: If she were to log on to www.socalphysicsgroup.org/activities/other, click on upcoming events, scroll down to seminars, download the PDF schedule, and look for the seminar on molecular positroneum, well then, bippity boppity boo, our pants are metaphorically on fire.
*Leonard shuts the door.*
Sheldon: Well, sir, my trousers will not be igniting today.

4

Quote from the episode The Skank Reflex Analysis

Sheldon: Whenever you're ready, AT&T!

4

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Penny: Oh, please, it's not a time machine, if anything, it looks like something Elton John would drive through the Everglades.
Sheldon: It only moves in time, it would be worse than useless in a swamp.

4

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Sheldon: Oh, no, not Morlocks, not flesh eating Morlocks! Help!

4

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Sheldon: How would one measure a sense of humor? A humormometer?

4

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Sheldon: Tell Mom that I currently weigh 165 pounds and that I'm having regular bowel movements.

4

Showing quotes 811 to 840 of 1129Sort by  popularity | date added | episode

Submit Quotes