Sheldon Quotes Page 28 of 41
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Quote from the episode The Bad Fish Paradigm
Raj: I hate trains.
Sheldon: Oh, don't be silly. You love trains.
Quote from the episode The Zarnecki Incursion
Howard: Why did you bring that?
Sheldon: No weapon strikes more fear into a man's heart than a Klingon bat'leth.
Quote from the episode The White Asparagus Triangulation
Penny: I'll tell you what happened. (sigh) We were young. We were very much in love, but we could only communicate through a time-travelling mailbox at my lake house.
Sheldon: It's not enough that you made me watch that movie, but now you mock me with it?
Quote from the episode The Good Guy Fluctuation
Howard: You should've seen the look on your face!
Sheldon: Oh, yes. The slightly widened eyes of mildly surprised.
Quote from the episode The Vacation Solution
Amy: Sheldon, you have no experience in the field of biology whatsoever.
Sheldon: Excuse me, I'll let you know, I bought a Tamagotchi in 1993 and (pulls out Tamagotchi) it's still alive. Let's do this.
Quote from the episode The Hofstadter Insufficiency
Sheldon: Well now I know how it must have felt being mauled by that sex-crazed gorilla.
Quote from the episode The Romance Resonance
Sheldon: Oh stop it. I don't need to take this admiration from the likes of you people.
Quote from the episode The First Pitch Insufficiency
Leonard: I've seen you guys ignore each other for hours, doing totally different things.
Sheldon: It's called parallel play.
Leonard: Yeah, toddlers do that.
Sheldon: Not as well as we do.
Quote from the episode The Hook-Up Reverberation
Howard: All I know is he's got my mother buying four ply toilet paper. Four ply! If his butt is so delicate, why doesn't he use an Angora rabbit?
Sheldon: For starters, they shed and bite.
Quote from the episode The Expedition Approximation
Sheldon: "Sheldon's Mine Simulation Log, entry 4: My KitKat has melted. All is lost."
Quote from the episode The Cornhusker Vortex
Sheldon: If you want to blend in with Penny's friends, I'd think looking like an idiot would be the perfect camouflage.
Quote from the episode The Cruciferous Vegetable Amplification
Sheldon: I don't understand why you're not enjoying this. Together, in this car, with my enhanced capabilities, we're like 'Knight Rider.'
Leonard: Except, in Knight Rider, the car isn't a yammering sphincter.
Sheldon: You mock the sphincter, but, the sphincter is a class of muscle without which human beings couldn't survive. There are over 50 different sphincters in the human body. How many can you name?
Leonard: I was wrong. This is exactly like Knight Rider.
Quote from the episode The Thespian Catalyst
Sheldon: I agreed to speak to you this evening because I was told that you're the best and the brightest of this University's doctoral candidates.
Hmm. Course, that's saying you're the most important electron in a hydrogen atom. Because you see, there's only 1 electron in a hydrogen atom. Best and brightest my sweet patootee.
Quote from the episode The Loobenfeld Decay
Leonard: How long is [Toby/Leo] going to stay here?
Sheldon: He's a homeless drug addict, Leonard. Where's he going to go? Boy, you have a lot to learn about lying.
Quote from the episode The Loobenfeld Decay
Sheldon: Okay, then, riddle me this: Assuming all the good Terminators were originally evil Terminators created by Skynet but then reprogrammed by John Connor, why would Skynet, an artificial computer intelligence, bother to create a petite, hot, 17-year old killer robot?
Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor
Penny: What I'm saying is, Leonard might be different in a good way. And obviously, my usual choices have not worked out so well.
Sheldon: Your last choice worked out for Koothrappali. He got a free iPod.
Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation
Sheldon: Leonard, it's 2 in the morning.
Sheldon: So, it's my turn.
Quote from the episode The Raiders Minimization
Amy: When you told me I was going to be "losing my virginity", I didn't think you meant showing me Raiders of the Lost Ark for the first time.
Sheldon: My apologies. I chose my words poorly. I should have said you were about to have your world rocked on my couch.
Quote from the episode The Hesitation Ramification
Leonard: Are you set on people laughing WITH you? Because if you're cool with AT you ...
Sheldon: I don't get it.
Quote from the episode The Locomotive Manipulation
Sheldon: I'm prepared to say I love it, as soon as I confirm there are no hobos aboard.
Quote from the episode The Focus Attenuation
Howard: My cousin has a cabin out in the woods.
Sheldon: I'm not going to a cabin in the woods. Did you see the movie "Cabin in the Woods?"
Leonard: Fine, we'll go to a hotel.
Sheldon: A hotel? Did you see "The Shining"?
Raj: We could go up to Big Bear and get a house on the lake.
Sheldon: Did you see "The Lake House"?
Raj: Nothing bad happens in "The Lake House"!
Sheldon: Not to them. To me. Time travelling mail box. The only time that travels was the hour and a half of my life down the toilet.
Leonard: Fine, we'll just stay here and do it.
Sheldon: Wait, you didn't suggest a beach house.
Leonard: You would go to a beach house?
Sheldon: Well, good Lord no. Have you seen "Jaws"?
Quote from the episode The Hamburger Postulate
Sheldon: Can't we just go to Big Boy? They only have one burger: the Big Boy.
Penny: The Barbecue Burger is like the Big Boy.
Sheldon: Excuse me, in a world that already includes a Big Boy, why would I settle for something that's like a Big Boy?
Quote from the episode The Roommate Transmogrification
Sheldon: My hands are magic.
Quote from the episode The Agreement Dissection
Sheldon: It's hard to say no to Yoohoo, the name it literally beckons.
Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy
Missy: (Talking to the guys) He was trying to build some sort of armed robot to keep me out of his room.
Sheldon: Made necessary by her insistence on going into my room.
Quote from the episode The Middle-Earth Paradigm
Leonard: Why don't you just tell people you're a zebra?
Sheldon: Why don't you just tell people you're one of the seven dwarves?
Leonard: Because I'm Frodo.
Sheldon: Yes, well, I'm the Doppler effect.
Quote from the episode The Robotic Manipulation
Sheldon: So, this conversation is as pointless as your door knocking soliloquy?
Penny: Let me get my cockamamie keys.
Quote from the episode The Launch Acceleration
Sheldon: There is only one mind expanding drug this man enjoys, and that's called school.
Quote from the episode The Bat Jar Conjecture
Sheldon: I need my wrist brace. All this button pushing is aggravating my old Nintendo injury.
Quote from the episode The Ornithophobia Diffusion
Leonard: Do you think I'm overdressed?
Sheldon: It depends on the activity. For a prostate exam? Yes. If you're playing Vegas, I'd add sequins.