Sheldon Quotes Page 28 of 41

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Quote from the episode The Herb Garden Germination

Sheldon: I'm no stanger to mimetic epidemiology. At Johnson Elementary school, the phrase Shelly Cooper's a smelly pooper spread like wildfire.
Amy: I should think so, that's gold.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Loobenfeld Decay

Penny: You'll never guess what just happened!
Leonard: Oh, I give up!
Sheldon: I don't guess! As a scientist, I reach conclusions based on observations and experimentation. Although it occurs to me, you may have been employing a rhetorical device rendering my response moot.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation

Sheldon: Like the proverbial cheese, I stand alone. Even while seated.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Friendship Algorithm

Sheldon: "Gerry the Gerbil and the bully boys on the bus." Read it, not helpful.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Cruciferous Vegetable Amplification

Sheldon: Greetings, friends.
Leonard: (To Robot Sheldon) Greetings, whatever-the-hell you are.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Pulled Groin Extrapolation

Sheldon: All these years I've been so wrong. The tinier the trains, the more concentrated the fun.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Bat Jar Conjecture

Sheldon: I will form my own team and will destroy the molecular bonds that hold your matter together, and reduce the resulting particular chaos to tears.
Leonard: Thanks for the heads up.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Toast Derivation

Sheldon: Sadly Penny, this evening I am the dark knight roaming these mean streets alone. A windbreaker for my cape and a stern expression for my cowl.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Habitation Configuration

Sheldon: Ooh, now that is a treat that's hard to beat. Get the Mad Hatter on the horn. I'm having a tea party!

4.2

Quote from the episode The Shiny Trinket Maneuver

Sheldon: Remarkable. Diamonds. Crystalized carbon. Every day, people go to the grocery store and come home with sacks full of carbon, in the form of charcoal brickets, which they toss in their barbecues and set on fire. But just because you have some carbon with the atoms stacked neatly, you expect me to plunk down thousands of dollars.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Habitation Configuration

Sheldon: Eat one of your Luna bars. Very often when women think they're angry, they're really just hungry.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Convention Conundrum

James Earl Jones: Ah, Sheldon. This is the perfect end to a perfect night.
Sheldon: Okay. But I think it could have ended at the karaoke.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Hook-Up Reverberation

Emily: I'm a resident at Huntington Hospital.
Sheldon: Oh, I like their emergency room. You know, even if it turns out you don't have Dengue Fever, they still let you take a lollipop.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Expedition Approximation

Raj: So I did a little research on what the conditions are like in the mines, and the guys might be right. It sounds pretty rough down there. For starters, it's very humid and about a hundred degrees.
Sheldon: I'm from Texas and you're from India. We're no strangers to the fragrant arm pit. Next.
Raj: It's also a live mine, so there'll be dynamite explosions going off in the distance.
Sheldon: I have a lactose-intolerant roommate with a taste for ice cream. Next.
Raj: You have to be down there for twelve hours at a time.
Sheldon: Have to be somewhere.
Raj: There's no toilet, so we'll have to do our business in a bucket.
Sheldon: So it's settled? We're not doing it.

4.2

Quote from the episode Pilot

Penny: I'm so sorry. I really thought if you guys went instead of me, he wouldn't be such an ass.
Leonard: No, it was a valid hypothesis.
Sheldon: "Was a valid hypo-" . What is happening to you?

4.2

Quote from the episode The Benefactor Factor

Sheldon: Your critical attitude is ruining our Saturday night together, and I'm not above minimizing your window.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Transporter Malfunction

Sheldon: I love astro-physics. It's like looking at the universe naked.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Sheldon: I'm a superior genetic mutation, an improvement on the existing mediocre stock.
Missy: And what do you mean "mediocre stock"?!
Sheldon: That would be you.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis

Sheldon: Explain to me an organizational system where a tray of flatware on a couch is valid.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Bad Fish Paradigm

Raj: I hate trains.
Sheldon: Oh, don't be silly. You love trains.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Zarnecki Incursion

Howard: Why did you bring that?
Sheldon: No weapon strikes more fear into a man's heart than a Klingon bat'leth.

4.1

Quote from the episode The White Asparagus Triangulation

Penny: I'll tell you what happened. (sigh) We were young. We were very much in love, but we could only communicate through a time-travelling mailbox at my lake house.
Sheldon: It's not enough that you made me watch that movie, but now you mock me with it?

4.1

Quote from the episode The Good Guy Fluctuation

Howard: You should've seen the look on your face!
Sheldon: Oh, yes. The slightly widened eyes of mildly surprised.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Vacation Solution

Amy: Sheldon, you have no experience in the field of biology whatsoever.
Sheldon: Excuse me, I'll let you know, I bought a Tamagotchi in 1993 and (pulls out Tamagotchi) it's still alive. Let's do this.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Hofstadter Insufficiency

Sheldon: Well now I know how it must have felt being mauled by that sex-crazed gorilla.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Romance Resonance

Sheldon: Oh stop it. I don't need to take this admiration from the likes of you people.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Cornhusker Vortex

Sheldon: If you want to blend in with Penny's friends, I'd think looking like an idiot would be the perfect camouflage.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Thespian Catalyst

Sheldon: I agreed to speak to you this evening because I was told that you're the best and the brightest of this University's doctoral candidates.

Hmm. Course, that's saying you're the most important electron in a hydrogen atom. Because you see, there's only 1 electron in a hydrogen atom. Best and brightest my sweet patootee.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Loobenfeld Decay

Leonard: How long is [Toby/Leo] going to stay here?
Sheldon: He's a homeless drug addict, Leonard. Where's he going to go? Boy, you have a lot to learn about lying.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Loobenfeld Decay

Sheldon: Okay, then, riddle me this: Assuming all the good Terminators were originally evil Terminators created by Skynet but then reprogrammed by John Connor, why would Skynet, an artificial computer intelligence, bother to create a petite, hot, 17-year old killer robot?

4.1

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