Sheldon Quotes Page 28 of 41

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Quote from the episode The Convention Conundrum

James Earl Jones: Ah, Sheldon. This is the perfect end to a perfect night.
Sheldon: Okay. But I think it could have ended at the karaoke.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Hook-Up Reverberation

Emily: I'm a resident at Huntington Hospital.
Sheldon: Oh, I like their emergency room. You know, even if it turns out you don't have Dengue Fever, they still let you take a lollipop.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Expedition Approximation

Raj: So I did a little research on what the conditions are like in the mines, and the guys might be right. It sounds pretty rough down there. For starters, it's very humid and about a hundred degrees.
Sheldon: I'm from Texas and you're from India. We're no strangers to the fragrant arm pit. Next.
Raj: It's also a live mine, so there'll be dynamite explosions going off in the distance.
Sheldon: I have a lactose-intolerant roommate with a taste for ice cream. Next.
Raj: You have to be down there for twelve hours at a time.
Sheldon: Have to be somewhere.
Raj: There's no toilet, so we'll have to do our business in a bucket.
Sheldon: So it's settled? We're not doing it.

4.2

Quote from the episode Pilot

Penny: I'm so sorry. I really thought if you guys went instead of me, he wouldn't be such an ass.
Leonard: No, it was a valid hypothesis.
Sheldon: "Was a valid hypo-" . What is happening to you?

4.2

Quote from the episode The Benefactor Factor

Sheldon: Your critical attitude is ruining our Saturday night together, and I'm not above minimizing your window.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Transporter Malfunction

Sheldon: I love astro-physics. It's like looking at the universe naked.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Pancake Batter Anomaly

Sheldon: What kind of sick?
Penny: Oh, the flu, I guess.
Sheldon: I don't need you to guess, I need you to know. Now, when did the symptoms first appear?
Penny: Maybe Friday!
Sheldon: Friday! Was that morning or afternoon?
Penny: I don't--
Sheldon: Think, woman! Who blew their nose and when?

4.2

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Sheldon: I'm a superior genetic mutation, an improvement on the existing mediocre stock.
Missy: And what do you mean "mediocre stock"?!
Sheldon: That would be you.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Sheldon: Mmm. (In Mandarin) Your monkey sleeps inside me.

4.2

Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis

Sheldon: Explain to me an organizational system where a tray of flatware on a couch is valid.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Bad Fish Paradigm

Raj: I hate trains.
Sheldon: Oh, don't be silly. You love trains.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Zarnecki Incursion

Howard: Why did you bring that?
Sheldon: No weapon strikes more fear into a man's heart than a Klingon bat'leth.

4.1

Quote from the episode The White Asparagus Triangulation

Penny: I'll tell you what happened. (sigh) We were young. We were very much in love, but we could only communicate through a time-travelling mailbox at my lake house.
Sheldon: It's not enough that you made me watch that movie, but now you mock me with it?

4.1

Quote from the episode The Good Guy Fluctuation

Howard: You should've seen the look on your face!
Sheldon: Oh, yes. The slightly widened eyes of mildly surprised.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Vacation Solution

Amy: Sheldon, you have no experience in the field of biology whatsoever.
Sheldon: Excuse me, I'll let you know, I bought a Tamagotchi in 1993 and (pulls out Tamagotchi) it's still alive. Let's do this.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Hofstadter Insufficiency

Sheldon: Well now I know how it must have felt being mauled by that sex-crazed gorilla.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Romance Resonance

Sheldon: Oh stop it. I don't need to take this admiration from the likes of you people.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Cornhusker Vortex

Sheldon: If you want to blend in with Penny's friends, I'd think looking like an idiot would be the perfect camouflage.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Cruciferous Vegetable Amplification

Sheldon: I don't understand why you're not enjoying this. Together, in this car, with my enhanced capabilities, we're like 'Knight Rider.'
Leonard: Except, in Knight Rider, the car isn't a yammering sphincter.
Sheldon: You mock the sphincter, but, the sphincter is a class of muscle without which human beings couldn't survive. There are over 50 different sphincters in the human body. How many can you name?
Leonard: I was wrong. This is exactly like Knight Rider.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Thespian Catalyst

Sheldon: I agreed to speak to you this evening because I was told that you're the best and the brightest of this University's doctoral candidates.

Hmm. Course, that's saying you're the most important electron in a hydrogen atom. Because you see, there's only 1 electron in a hydrogen atom. Best and brightest my sweet patootee.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Loobenfeld Decay

Leonard: How long is [Toby/Leo] going to stay here?
Sheldon: He's a homeless drug addict, Leonard. Where's he going to go? Boy, you have a lot to learn about lying.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Loobenfeld Decay

Sheldon: Okay, then, riddle me this: Assuming all the good Terminators were originally evil Terminators created by Skynet but then reprogrammed by John Connor, why would Skynet, an artificial computer intelligence, bother to create a petite, hot, 17-year old killer robot?

4.1

Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Penny: What I'm saying is, Leonard might be different in a good way. And obviously, my usual choices have not worked out so well.
Sheldon: Your last choice worked out for Koothrappali. He got a free iPod.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Sheldon: Leonard, it's 2 in the morning.
Leonard: So?
Sheldon: So, it's my turn.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Raiders Minimization

Amy: When you told me I was going to be "losing my virginity", I didn't think you meant showing me Raiders of the Lost Ark for the first time.
Sheldon: My apologies. I chose my words poorly. I should have said you were about to have your world rocked on my couch.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Hesitation Ramification

Leonard: Are you set on people laughing WITH you? Because if you're cool with AT you ...
Sheldon: I don't get it.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Locomotive Manipulation

Sheldon: I'm prepared to say I love it, as soon as I confirm there are no hobos aboard.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Hamburger Postulate

Sheldon: Can't we just go to Big Boy? They only have one burger: the Big Boy.
Penny: The Barbecue Burger is like the Big Boy.
Sheldon: Excuse me, in a world that already includes a Big Boy, why would I settle for something that's like a Big Boy?

4.1

Quote from the episode The Roommate Transmogrification

Sheldon: My hands are magic.

4.1

Quote from the episode The Agreement Dissection

Sheldon: It's hard to say no to Yoohoo, the name it literally beckons.

4.1

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