Oliver: Hey, buddy. I talked to Nell. She was pretty upset after you left.
Raj: Yeah, I'm sorry.
Oliver: No. No, no, no. She told me that you said something so creepy that I seemed great in comparison.
Raj: I know exactly what it was. No, actually, there was a couple of things it could've been. Whichever one it was, it was creepy.

Oliver: Anyway, uh, I went over to comfort her, and we talked, and I think we're gonna give it another chance.
Raj: I am so happy for you! Hey, uh, we should celebrate.
Oliver: House of Pies?
Raj: You know it.
Oliver: Should we invite Nell?
Raj: Do we have to?
Oliver: Nah.

Sheldon: So you're not going to do something just because you think it might upset me?
Amy: Well, it's tricky, because answering that question honestly is one of the things I tend not to do because it upsets you.
Sheldon: Well, that's very upsetting.
Amy: Like I said.

Sheldon: What other things don't you do because of me?
Amy: Remember last week when we went to that dueling piano bar I was so excited about?
Sheldon: No.
Amy: Well, now you're getting it.

Amy: Look, at least if you watch it, maybe you can find more specific things to criticize.
Sheldon: Oh, that is a good point. Criticisms are more hurtful when they're specific.

Wil Wheaton: [on TV] Hey, everybody. I'm Professor Proton. Welcome to the show. Today I will be teaching you how to make a real hovercraft using common household items.
Sheldon: Darn it, I do like objects that hover.
Wil Wheaton: [on TV] All you will need is a CD, a bottle cap, a balloon, and some super glue.
Sheldon: Oh, no! I have all those things!

Penny: So, how's the book coming along?
Leonard: Uh, good. I just wrote the part where the hero, hotshot physicist Logan Dean, arrives at CERN.
Penny: Oh, is he based on you?
Leonard: Uh, kind of. But he can eat dairy products without having to leave the room.
Penny: Yeah, that's smart, because CERN is in Switzerland and there's a lot of cheese there.
Leonard: Hmm. Uh, believe me, that is a plot point later.

Leonard: Oh. Oh! I just thought of the murder weapon!
Penny: Swiss army knife?
Leonard: (laughs) No. [after Penny leaves] That's way better.

Sheldon: Look, it works! We did it!
Amy: See, there was a reason to keep that TurboTax CD.
Sheldon: Yeah. A CD-ROM? More like "CD-vroom."

Amy: Do you feel bad you told Wil Wheaton that you'd be his enemy if he did this show?
Sheldon: No. I feel bad I'm engaged to somebody that would point that out.

Wil Wheaton: [on TV] Oh, I wonder who that could be.
Sheldon: Just when I thought this couldn't get any better, Wil has introduced suspense into the show.
Wil Wheaton: [on TV] Hey, it's real NASA astronaut, Howard Wolowitz!
Sheldon: (loudly) What?!

Sheldon: How could Wil ask Howard to be on his show and not me?
Amy: Well, he is an astronaut. And he didn't start an online petition to get Wil fired.
Sheldon: But why wouldn't Howard tell me?
Amy: Well, because he probably worried that you'd be a big baby about it.
Sheldon: All those answers make a lot of sense. Thank you, Amy. That helps.

Sheldon: Howard, I want you to know that I forgive you.
Howard: I'll take it.
Leonard: What's he forgiving you for?
Howard: Don't care. Clean slate. Happy Yom Kippur to me.

Sheldon: I know that you were on Wil's show, and I know why you didn't tell me.
Howard: Do you?
Sheldon: Because you were afraid that I would be difficult and annoying about it.
Howard: (chuckles) I hope your book has a twist as surprising as that.
Leonard: It doesn't.

Bernadette: But this is good so far, really good.
Leonard: Yeah?
Bernadette: Yeah. I have no idea who the killer is.
Leonard: Oh, great. Me, neither.