Leonard: Ms. Davis, you wanted to see me?
Ms. Davis: Yes, Dr. Hofstadter, come on in.
Leonard: Should I sit or stand? I'm not used to being called into the dean's office.
Ms. Davis: Please, sit.
Leonard: I have to say I'm a little nervous.
Ms. Davis: You should be.

Leonard: Look, I know I screwed up, but it was only one interview. How much damage could it have caused?
Ms. Davis: Would you like for me to read you the e-mails from donors asking why are they giving us money if physics is a dead end?
Leonard: I didn't say it was a dead end. I just said that I was worried it might be.
Ms. Davis: So if I just said I was worried you might not have a job next week, how would you feel?
Leonard: Light-headed, and glad you asked me to sit down.

Leonard: Okay, just tell me what I can do.
Ms. Davis: I'm gonna need you to make a statement saying that you misspoke, and that you're confident the physics community is close to a major breakthrough.
Leonard: You want me to lie.
Ms. Davis: Look, Dr. Hofstadter, I'm counting on you. I think that you are the smartest physicist at this university.
Leonard: Really?
Ms. Davis: See? Lies. They're not that hard.

Howard: There's Leonard. I'll bet he's having a rough day.
Raj: Let's just try to be supportive.
Sheldon: Supportive? He publicly maligned the love of my life, Lady Physics.
Howard: You might not want to mention that to Lady Fiance.

Leonard: Hey, guys.
Raj: Hey, how's it going?
Sheldon: Pff.
Leonard: What? You got something to say?
Sheldon: I think I just said it. P-F-F. Pff!

Leonard: Look, I was just speaking the truth. We're scientists. Isn't that what we're supposed to do?
Sheldon: Oh, what would you know about the truth? You thought Phantom Menace was "not half bad."
Leonard: I told you that in confidence!

Raj: Okay, calm down. Everybody just cool it.
Howard: No, let 'em go. If we get lucky, maybe one of them will start crying.

Leonard: Uh, can we just drop this and have lunch like adults?
Howard: Fine.
Sheldon: Very well. Leonard?
Leonard: What?
Sheldon: Pff!

Ira Flatow: Hi, I'm Ira Flatow, and this is Science Friday. Joining me today is my guest physicist, Dr. Leonard Hofstadter, to talk about all of the exciting research they're doing at Cal Tech.
Leonard: Thank you for having me. Whoa (chuckles) Could never get used to hearing myself in headphones. Is that really how I sound?
Ira Flatow: (chuckles) It is. It is.
Leonard: (deep voice): That is good to know.

Sheldon: I told him his voice was annoying. He didn't want to listen.
Penny: Hey!
Sheldon: You're saying it's not?
Penny: Just ... hey.

Ira Flatow: So, it has been five years since the discovery of the Higgs boson. What's the next big thing gonna be?
Leonard: Wow, that's hard to say. There's so much going on. We've been collecting tons of data that could revolutionize the way we understand the universe. For instance, there's a particle called a squark, which could prove super-symmetry.
Ira Flatow: That is interesting. Have you found it?
Leonard: What, the squark?
Ira Flatow: Yes.
Leonard: No, no. Wouldn't that be exciting? But we're also looking for the selectron, the gluino and the neutralino.
Ira Flatow: Well, and have you found that?
Leonard: No.

Leonard: Another fun sidenote, I went to high school with a girl named Theresa Gluino, but it didn't cost $2 billion to find her. She was smoking behind the gym.

Bernadette: Should he be saying that?
Raj: Uh, probably not.
Howard: Yeah, this is public radio. Doesn't he realize that dozens of people might hear him?

Sheldon: Uh, One dumpling left. Who wants it?
Amy: Maybe you should offer it to the pregnant lady.
Sheldon: And that would be..?
Bernadette: Me, Sheldon. I'm obviously pregnant.
Sheldon: Well, you never said it to my face. And the last time I assumed a woman was pregnant, it did not go over well.
Penny: Yeah, I'm still mad at you.
Sheldon: You were drinking water instead of wine. What was I supposed to think?

Raj: Sheldon's right. I would never ask a woman if she was pregnant, unless she tells me or I see a human being wiggling out of her.