Leonard: How was your flight?
Beverly Hofstadter: There were some parents with a baby. A lot of crying.
Leonard: Well, babies do that.
Beverly Hofstadter: No, it was the parents. It seems they couldn't handle some constructive criticism.

Sheldon: I'm looking over my text correspondence with Beverly and I don't see anything that would have given her offense. Nothing's ambiguous, I spell everything out. Including "laugh out loud" and "what's the fracas?"

Leonard: You can't pick her up. It'll make me look like a bad son.
Sheldon: I imagine that's one of the things we'll talk about on the ride. That and Amy's recent reluctance to use turn signals.
Amy: We were in a parking garage.

Leonard: I am so stupid. I-I actually thought my mom was genuinely proud of me. It turns out, she's just using me as research for her new book.
Sheldon: Oh, what a relief. I thought Beverly was mad at me. Thank you, Leonard. That is a weight off my shoulders.

Amy: I'm sure she's not mad at you.
Sheldon: Well, then why would she rather spend the day with Leonard?
Amy: Because he's her son?
Sheldon: Amy, I just feel like we're going in circles.

Beverly Hofstadter: Really? A photon entanglement team.
Leonard: Yeah, I'm actually the colead.
Penny: Yeah, if you like photons and how they get entangled, he's your co-guy.

Penny: Wow, she's being really nice.
Leonard: Yeah, clearly, one of us is dying. Come on, her.

Sheldon: Leonard, when are you leaving to pick your mother up from the airport?
Leonard: Uh, well, let's see, her plane gets in at 3:00, figure half hour to get her luggage, so never.

Denise: My neck's a little stiff. Maybe because my boyfriend made me sleep in a comic book store last night.
Stuart: Bet your neck would hurt if you slept in any store. Except maybe a mattress store.

Raj: Well, we got into this because we both wanted to get married, and honestly, we've been dragging our feet, and I think this is the push that we need.
Bernadette: Wait, so you're gonna ask her to marry you?
Raj: Why not? We like each other, plus, we both want to start a family. Hey, I can work from anywhere, I'm an astronomer. They have stars in London, and I'm not just talking about Dame Judi Dench.
Howard: No one thought you were.
Bernadette: I thought he was.

Sheldon: Oh, maybe I should pick her up.
Amy: You don't drive.
Sheldon: That's what makes you and me a great team. Go get your keys.

Leonard: I can't believe this.
Beverly Hofstadter: What? You seem angry.
Leonard: Of course I'm angry!
Beverly Hofstadter: Well, so would you say that you're somewhat angry, very angry or extremely angry? Never mind. I can see it in your face, dear.

Leonard: Hey, on a completely unrelated note, um, you know, if you'd rather stay at a hotel, we wouldn't be offended.
Beverly Hofstadter: Actually, I've been looking forward to staying with you.
Leonard: Really? It's just, normally, you stay at a hotel.
Beverly Hofstadter: Would you like me to stay at a hotel?
Leonard: No, no, no. I invited you to stay with us.
Beverly Hofstadter: And I accepted, so everyone is happy.
Leonard: Yep. I'm happy, you're happy everyone's happy.

Howard: Doesn't she have her own place? Why don't you guys hang out there?
Stuart: Oh, she has a roommate, and he's kind of creepy. A-And that's coming from me.

Leonard: Penny, can I have a moment alone with my?
Penny: Yep, bye.