Penny: I smell Chinese food.
Sheldon: It's actually Thai. You're slipping.

Penny: Are Leonard and Priya here?
Sheldon: They went to Catalina for the weekend.
Penny: Oh. Where's Raj?
Sheldon: At home, forbidding it.
Penny: How about Howard?
Sheldon: I'm given to understand his mother grounded him for running away.

Zack: I'm Zack and I'm, uh ... could you come back to me?

Penny: You know, well, I'm happy Leonard's found someone. Not that anybody asked.

Leonard: Is it racist that I took you to an Indian restaurant?
Priya: It's okay, I like Indian food.
Leonard: Or as you probably call it back home, food.

Sheldon: It's not cool. It's a childish trick designed to confuse and intrigue simpletons. How'd you do it?
Howard: A magician never reveals his secrets. But surely a future Nobel prize winner can figure it out.
Sheldon: Fine. Give me a second.
Howard: You ever notice when he thinks real hard, it smells like bacon?

Howard: That's your card, right?
Penny: Seven of clubs! That is amazing!
Sheldon: It's not amazing. All magic tricks are merely a combination of manipulation and misdirection with the occasional dwarf in a box wiggling his feet.
Howard: Oh, really? So how did I do it?
Sheldon: Well, I don't care how you did it. I have more important things to think about. Clearly, the cards are marked.
Howard: I thought you had more important things to think about.
Sheldon: I do. You just happen to have caught me on a break.

Howard: So you finally getting used to them doing it on a daily basis?
Penny: I'm not going out with him. He can sleep with whoever he wants.
Howard: Yeah, I was talking to Raj.
Penny: Oopsy.

Priya: How many Star Trek uniforms do you have?
Leonard: Just two. Everyday and dress.

Priya: You need to cut the cord with Penny.
Leonard: Oh. Okay.
Priya: You don't sound very confident.
Leonard: No, no, I'm confident. It's not like I'm unfamiliar with the get lost conversation. Although, this will be the first time Illl be the one saying it.

Howard: And was your card the jack of diamonds?
Penny: Oh, unbelievable! Know how he did it yet?
Sheldon: Umm...
Penny: Aww, he has the same look my little nephew gets when he can't figure out how I got his nose.
Howard: You know, I have some remedial magic tricks that might be more your speed. Like, ooh, look! The pencil's rubber!

Penny: Hey, I think I know how you did the card trick.
Sheldon: Oh. Oh, please. If I don't know, you don't know. That's axiomatic.
Penny: Come here. (Whispers theory to Howard)
Howard: You're right.
Penny: Not too bad for someone who doesn't know what axiomatic means.

Leonard: Oh, hi.
Penny: Hey, you. What happened with the contacts?
Leonard: One of them's upstairs. The other one sort of slipped back into my skull.

Priya: So did you get to talk to Penny?
Leonard: Oh, yes. Indeed, I did.
Priya: And?
Leonard: She completely understood everything I said. Case closed.
Priya: Was she upset?
Leonard: Maybe, but that's not my problem. She's not my girlfriend, you are.
Priya: I hope you weren't cruel to her.
Leonard: Is the autumn cruel for letting the flowers die, or is that just nature's way?

Leonard: Holy crap, are you connected to the Oak Ridge National Laboratory?
Sheldon: Yes. I'm using their Cray Supercomputer to analyze shuffling patterns.
Leonard: Sheldon, that computer is used for national defense. Hacking into it is a federal crime.
Sheldon: Relax, we're not under attack right now.
Leonard: Okay, I'm leaving before the black helicopters get here.