Sheldon: I see what you're doing. You accept an invitation to a party at the home of my sworn enemy, he tells everyone we're going to be there, and when we don't show, he looks the fool. Fiendishly clever.
Leonard: I was actually thinking about going.
Sheldon: And then declaring the party a fiasco and storming out, leaving him humiliated in front of his guests. Love it.

Leonard: No, I was gonna grab Raj and Howard and have a good time.
Stuart: Oh, great, more guys. It's gonna be another Wil Wheaton sausage-fest.

Leonard: Sheldon, can you grab me a water?
Sheldon: Possibly.
Leonard: Can you or can't you?
Sheldon: It's not that simple, Leonard.
Leonard: It never is, is it?

Leonard: Got it. Can I have my water?
Sheldon: Of course. (Knocking Leonard's bottle of water away) Now get it yourself, you traitor.

Leonard: I'd like to propose a toast. The dream to go up into space is one we all share, and Howard's making that a reality. We're all very proud of you.
Everybody: Cheers.
Sheldon: That was a lovely toast. Kudos.
Leonard: Thank you.
Sheldon: Simultaneously, a festival of cloying clichs. You sicken me.

Howard: You're really quiet. Is everything okay?
Bernadette: Fine. Just a little tired.
Howard: I hope not too tired, because I'm feeling particularly masculine right now. All systems go, if you catch my drift.
Bernadette: I always catch your drift.

Howard: All right, well, something's obviously bugging you. What is it?
Bernadette: I just can't believe you signed up for the space program without even talking to me.
Howard: Oh, I get it. You're worried about me. That is so sweet. You know, there's a saying we have at NASA. What makes the right stuff so right is that it always comes home.
Bernadette: Just stop talking, Howard.

Howard: This isn't the reaction I expected when I told you I was gonna be an astronaut.
Bernadette: What did you think was going to happen?
Howard: Honestly? Sex.
Bernadette: Howard!

Howard: Do you realize what a big deal this is? What an honor it is to be chosen to go into space?
Bernadette: Yeah, I get it. I just wish you included me in the decision. We're supposed to be partners. We're supposed to be a team.
Howard: I'm sorry. You're right. Okay, let's try this again. Bernadette, an opportunity has come up that impacts both of us, and I'd like to discuss it.
Bernadette: Okay.
Howard: I've been offered a chance to go up to the International Space Station for three weeks. What are your thoughts on that?
Bernadette: Well, first of all, thank you for including me in the decision-making process.
Howard: Hey, we're a team. So, what do you think?
Bernadette: No.
Howard: No?
Bernadette: No.

Leonard: Pretty cool about Howard, huh?
Sheldon: Dont talk to me as if nothing's happened between us. And yes, it sure is, buddy.
Leonard: For God's sake, will you stop with the Schrodinger stuff?
Sheldon: Would you prefer a simpler application of Heisenberg's uncertainty principle, in which I could either know where you are or whether I like you, but not both?
Leonard: You never stop talking, do you?

Amy: How did Wil Wheaton get on the list?
Everybody: Oh!
Sheldon: As a child, I loved Wesley Crusher, Wil Wheaton's character on Star Trek. So, I drove for hours by bus to a Star Trek convention at which Wil Wheaton was scheduled to appear, so that I could get my Wesley Crusher action figure signed. But he never showed, because apparently, it was cooler for him to be the lower-left corner on Hollywood Squares.
Oh, damn! The floppy failed. Well, whoever was in charge of quality control at the Verbatim Corporation in 1989, congratulations, you just made the list.

Raj: So, what's gonna happen next? Are you and Bernadette going to break up?
Howard: I don't know. If we're going to get back together, she's going to have to apologize and accept that I'm a grown man who can make his own decisions.
Raj: Then she's going to have to convince your mother to let you go into space.
Howard: Obviously.

Penny: Well, that, that's good. I'm glad you came to that. But before you do, let me just ask you a big picture question.
Bernadette: What?
Penny: Are you a hundred percent positive you love and want to marry Howard Wolowitz?
Bernadette: I do, with all my heart.
Penny: Got it. Just had to check.

Leonard: All right, Sheldon, we're going to Wil's. This is your last chance.
Sheldon: No, Leonard, this is your last chance. One day, a historian is going to come to you and say, is it true you were friends with Dr. Sheldon Cooper? And you're going to have to choke back a hot sob of regret and humiliation as you mumble, I was, but I chose to go to a party thrown by the one kid from Stand By Me that no one remembers.

Leonard: Hey, Sheldon?
Sheldon: Oh, good. You picked me, you picked me.
Leonard: No, I just got a text from Stuart. Brent Spiner is at the party.
Sheldon: Brent Spiner?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: I don't care.
Leonard: Really? Brent Spiner, Mr. Data himself. You love him.
Sheldon: I did, but I think I've kind of outgrown Star Trek. You know, stock characters, ludicrous plots, beam me up. What a load of hooey.
Leonard: I'm going. Live long and prosper, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Yeah, even that. You look like a dork.