Howard: Great. Come on in.
Raj: What, you don't say thank you?
Howard: It's my suitcase. I lent it to you two years ago.
Raj: Well, then, I should tell you I broke the wheel and the handle.

Amy: You don't have to come in here and cheer me up.
Sheldon: Thank you. Would you go tell everyone else that? Because they sure think otherwise.

Howard: The love spell takes effect. When Sheldon looks at Amy, she is the most beautiful half-orc he's ever seen, and he's overcome with a desire to rip her armor off and gaze fondly at her four hairy breasts. When Amy sees Sheldon, he looks, well, just like Sheldon, 'cause apparently she’s into that.

Sheldon: I know it doesn't seem like it to you, but for me what we have is extremely intimate.
Amy: I guess I know that. It's just part of me wants more.
Sheldon: More? I mean, look at us. It's only been three years, here we are in bed together.

Sheldon: Oh, I don't know about you guys, but I have been through the emotional wringer tonight.
Bernadette: This may be the potion talking, but you are one fine-ass dungeon master.
Howard: Oh, yeah? Well, when we get home, I'm gonna take you on a whole different adventure.
Sheldon: Another quest by Wolowitz? Count me in.
Amy: Sheldon, they're talking about sex.
Sheldon: Oh, then I'm out.

Raj: Lucy?
Lucy: Hey, long time no see.
Raj: You don't know me very well, but each time you crawl out a bathroom window to escape my company, it chips away at my masculinity.

Penny: Fifteen's the point, the point is fifteen. Give the little lady some room. Here it is, coming out. Sixteen! Yes! Oh, please tell me we're playing for money.
Sheldon: Oh, even better than money. You gained experience points.
Penny: More potion, please.

Penny: You know what? Give me the dice, I want to roll.
Howard: The dungeon master's supposed to roll.
Penny: Yeah, well Im supposed to be in Vegas throwing up on a shrimp buffet. Now give it.

Leonard: All right, Amy, there's one ogre left. Take him out.
Amy: Okay.
Penny: Pretend he's that TSA agent. Come on.
Amy: Nineteen. Yes, this is turning out to be even better than Vegas.
Penny: No, it's not.

Penny: Okay, who wants a drink?
Sheldon: Now, Penny, we don't consume alcohol during Dungeons & Dragons. It impairs our judgment.
Penny: Oh, this isn't alcohol. It's a magic potion that makes me like you.
Leonard: Double potion, please.

Howard: A satanic fungus that looks suspiciously like Al Pacino rises from the forest floor and says, (Imitating Al Pacino) "You're playing D&D. You're playing D&D. This whole apartment is playing D&D."

Leonard: Amy, wait. I know it's not the night you had in mind, but why don't you guys stay and play with us? It'll be fun.
Sheldon: It would? Fun? Okay, three weeks ago you bought crunchy peanut butter, now you want the girls to play D&D? Do you have a drug problem?

Raj: Oh, Lucy's free after all. See ya.
Leonard: Hey, hey, hey. You can't leave. We just started.
Raj: You're right, I should finish the game. I take my plus-one long sword, stab myself in the face with it. I'm dead. I've got a date with a girl. Bye.

Amy: You guys enjoy your evening. I'm gonna go before I ruin anybody else's weekend.
Sheldon: Ah, that's my girl.

Howard: The ladies are away, the boys will play.
Raj: Anything can happen.
Leonard: It's gonna get crazy.
Sheldon: Dungeons & Dragons!