Raj: Hang on. If you're really Nathan Fillion, what's the line from Firefly about your bonnet?
Customer: I swear by my pretty floral bonnet, I will end you.
Leonard: That's it. That's the line.
Raj: Although, I knew the line, doesn't make me Nathan Fillion.

Kevin Smith: So, Penny, listen, I saw your movie.
Penny: Oh, wow. I wish it was better.
Wil Wheaton: Oh, don't worry about it. Have you seen some of Kevin's films?
Kevin Smith: You're cruisin' for a beatin', Wheaton.

Stuart: I don't want to rush you, but I'm closing a little early tonight.
Raj: Ooh, hot date?
Stuart: Uh, no. I overheard Bernadette tell Howard she was making him a meatloaf, and you don't have to not ask me twice.

Sheldon: Just out of curiosity, Penny, if this experiment does make us fall in love, would you drive me to Lake Geneva, Wisconsin, for Gary-Con. It's the only convention celebrating the life and work of Gary Gygax, the co-creator of Dungeons and Dragons.
Penny: You know what, I can honestly say if we fall in love, not only will I drive you there, I will buy you all the dragon t-shirts you want.
Sheldon: Okay, babe, let's do this.

Howard: Did you play badminton or sadminton?

Howard: And just so you know, when this started I was going to put the TARDIS in a discreet corner of the house. But I've since turned mean and now it's going in the middle of the living room on a rotating platform with a sign that says "Suck It".

Sheldon: One question about that picture. Can it be with George Lucas? Ooh, grumpy you are.

Sheldon: Oh, good. You're here. I need your assistance.
Leonard: Can it wait until I put a Band-Aid on a goat bite?

Sheldon: I think what really needs to be rescued is your sense of whimsy. But one quest at a time.

Amy: If you still have that bra, I'll give you a nickel for it.

Emily: If I stick a light bulb on this, will it make a great lamp for my bedroom?
Raj: You're kidding, right?
Emily: Oh, is this freaking you out?
Raj: I guess I'm just more of a Pottery Barn, Crate and Barrel kind of guy. Maybe Pier 1 if I really want to cut loose.

Amy: Well, it applies to you, too.
Sheldon: I was afraid you might bring this up, so I have a work-around. *puts a picture of his face in front of his real face* There you go. As far as you're concerned, I'm smiling. Although, I must admit, I'm smiling a little bit at the moment because this loophole is so brilliant.

Sheldon: I just restocked the old PRK.
Penny: PRK?
Leonard: Public Restroom Kit. Everything a boy needs for making pee-pee in new and strange places.

Amy: Can you please pass the salt?
Sheldon: Sure. It's not like I was invited to Richard Feynman's house and having anything better to do.
Amy: Is this how the rest of the night's going to be?
Sheldon: I don't know the future.

Sheldon: I don't see what's crazy about bringing a backpack with your own toilet paper and Purell.
Leonard: Keep going.
Sheldon: And rubber gloves, and air freshener. Noise cancelling headphones. Oh, danger whistle. Umm, pepper spray. Ooh, a multi-language occupied sign. Let's see, we have seat protectors, booties for my shoes, a clothes pin for my nose. Oh, and, a mirror on a stick so I can make sure the person in the stall next to me isn't some kid of weirdo.