Sheldon: Well, you know, here is something that might cheer you up. The flag of the Isle of Man is nothing but three legs sharing a weird pair of underpants, so ... you think you got problems.

Raj: But, Amy, when you and Sheldon split up, didn't you start dating someone right away? Amy: Well, I ... I wouldn't say right away.
Sheldon: And actually, it was three different men.
Barry Kripke: Three different men?! Damn, girl, way to give the milk away!

Amy: Oh, looks like we just lost Kripke.
Barry Kripke: Actually, I'm still here.
Amy: Now?
Barry Kripke: Yup.
Amy: Now?
Barry Kripke: Yup!
Amy: Now? ... Oh, looks like we just lost Kripke.

Amy: Hi. You're on Fun with Flags.
Barry Kripke: Hello. I want to talk about how lonely I am, too.
Raj: Kripke? Is that you?
Barry Kripke: Yeah, I'm just sitting here all by myself wondering if I'll ever find someone to share my life with. Preferably Asian, 18-24, no fatties.

Howard: Should we name him?
Bernadette: It is Valentine's Day. How about Valentino?
Howard: Nice. A classic rabbit name. Peter Rabbit, Roger Rabbit. Valentino Wolowitz Rabbit.
Oh, look at all that chest hair and overbite. Of course you're a Wolowitz.

Howard: Son of a bitch! He bit me!
Bernadette: Are you okay?
Howard: No, I'm not okay! Wild rabbits can have rabies!
Bernadette: Oh. Well, why did you put your finger near its mouth?
Howard: Poor judgment, obviously.
Bernadette: He's so little. I'm sure it's fine.
Howard: How can it be fine? I just got attacked by a clearly anti-Semitic wild animal.

Penny: Can you believe when I met you I was 22? I mean, it's crazy! Where did all that time go?
Leonard: Mmm, you watched The Bachelor a lot.
Penny: Yeah, go ahead and make jokes, but your thirties are almost over.
Leonard: No, they're not.
Penny: You're closer to 40 than you are 30.
Leonard: Ha, ha! You married an old man.

Amy: Look, I know you both feel bad about being alone, but sometimes the best thing you can do is take a little time for yourself, especially when you just got out of a relationship.
Sheldon: Speaking of ending relationships, when British Honduras became Belize, they designed a new flag with a tree on it, and I would like to hang myself from that tree.

Penny: I was just hungry and cranky, and I've never been called "ma'am" before.
Leonard: Is that a big deal?
Penny: Kind of. When was the first time someone called you "sir"?
Leonard: Sixth grade, but I wore a sport coat and carried a briefcase, so...

Sheldon: Oh, well, you two sit down and get to know each other. I'll get your room ready.
Meemaw: Oh, now don't you go looking through my suitcase for presents.
Sheldon: If I did, would I find any?
Meemaw: Maybe. But you also might find my brassieres and bloomers.
Sheldon: That's a risk I'm willing to take!

Sheldon: Ooh, hey, oh, ask her to do the tissue thing. Do it, ask her.
Amy: Can I have a tissue?
Meemaw: Of course. (Meemaw pulls a tissue out of her sleeve)
Sheldon: Isn't that the best?! She's like Grandma Spider-Man.
Meemaw: He's been saying that since he was little. I still don't know what it means.

Amy: That's great. And look at you, sitting in Sheldon's spot. You know, I don't even get to sit there.
Sheldon: Yeah. And you never will.

Sheldon: Here's a fun Postal fact. Yeah, the inner side of our mailbox is under federal jurisdiction. So, if you broke my right thumb, that's Pasadena city police. But if you broke my left thumb, that's the FBI.
Leonard: If I'm going to jail, I'm killing him, not breaking his thumb.

Amy: How was your trip?
Meemaw: Wonderful. And the pilot did such a good job, I gave him a butterscotch.

Sheldon: There's Amy. I just know you're gonna hit it off. You both have the same fashion sense.