Zack: I see what you're saying. She's not so great.
Raj: Don't listen to him. He says crazy things all the time. Uh, watch. Marco.
Zack: Polo.

Raj: Yeah, okay, just do me a favor and stop talking about how great Claire is.
Zack: Anything for you, my little foreign friend.

Raj: Perhaps some of his mojo will rub off on us. Maybe between this and his beach house, we will be inspired to greatness.
Sheldon: I usually don't put too much stock in charms and talismans. However, even I must admit feeling Richard Feynman's butt dent cupping my own bottom that does get the creative juices flowing.
Howard: Hey, I have to return this van. Keep your creative juices in your pants.

Sheldon: What was that?
Howard: I think it's a tire.
Sheldon: What if it's banditos shooting at us? What if we get kidnapped? What if we end up in a factory making Bart Simpson pinatas for the rest of our lives?

Amy: How long do you think you can keep it from him?
Bernadette: Yeah, isn't it gonna get worse the longer you wait?
Penny: Well, not necessarily. You know, Dad's not getting any younger, so if I wait long enough, I'll just tell him he walked me down the aisle and it was magical.

Raj: When did you learn how to change a tire?
Howard: Every self-respecting gentleman should know how in case he comes across a damsel in distress by the side of the road.
Sheldon: If I see one scorpion, I am getting on someone's shoulders and never coming down.
Leonard: And there's your damsel.

Howard: Okay, let me stop you right there. We absolutely know our invention will not be used to destroy the world.
Leonard: How?
Howard: Because no one from the future has come back to kill us.

Raj: Hey, dude, you're killing me with Claire.
Zack: What are you talking about?
Raj: I mean, come on, look at you. You're classically handsome, you've got a swimmer's body. Next to you, I look like me.

Raj: Hey, so what was Adam West like on the phone?
Leonard: Uh, nice guy. But it was a little weird to hear Batman say, "Don't ring the doorbell or my poodles will go crazy."

Penny: What else you hiding in there?
Sheldon: Wouldn't you like to know?
Penny: I would.
Sheldon: All right then. See, just my valuables. My passport, uh, my will-
Leonard: You have a will?
Sheldon: Yeah. My 1/18 scale Wil Wheaton action figure.

Amy: So Sheldon, there's something I've been wanting to talk about but I know it's kind of a touchy subject.
Leonard: Way to narrow it down to everything.

Adam Nimoy: What about from when you were a kid?
Sheldon: Oh, certainly.
Sheldon: Uh, when I was eight years old, Billy Sparks cornered me in the playground.
I asked myself, "What would Spock do?" Then I grabbed Billy on his shoulder and performed my first Vulcan nerve pinch.
Adam Nimoy: Did it work?
Sheldon: Oh, no. He broke my collarbone. I can still hear it click.

Leonard: Can I get his contact info?
Stuart: Sure, uh, but just so you know, he's kind of a diva.
Leonard: He is?
Stuart: Oh, yeah. Won't take the bus. He won't pack his own lunch. Won't let you spend the night on his couch.

Penny: Yeah, what is the problem? Is it about getting older?
Sheldon: Please! Look at this porcelain skin. I'm like a human sink.

Penny: Wait a minute. You mention his birthday and he vanishes?
Leonard: Well, where's that information been this whole time?