The Big Bang Theory - Sheldon Quotes

Penny: Really? On top of everything you're afraid of birds?
Sheldon: Its called ornithophobia and someday it will be recognized as a true disability and the landlord will be required by law to put a giant net over the building, which is unfortunate because I have a fear of nets.

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Penny: (To the robot arm) That's amazing.
Sheldon: I wouldn't say amazing. At best it's a modest leap forward from the basic technology that gave us Country Bear Jamboree.
Howard: Hey, Sheldon? Ahem.
Sheldon: Yes?
*Howard commands the robot arm to flash the piece sign.*
Sheldon: Peace?
Howard: No, not peace. Hang on.

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Leonard: Cause of death for Uncle Carl was KBB? What's KBB?
Sheldon: Killed by badger.
Leonard: How's that?
Sheldon: It was Thanksgiving. Uncle Carl said, "I think there's a badger living in our chimney. Hand me that flashlight." Those were the last words he ever spoke to us.

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Sheldon: I believe I do, I'm the guy.
Penny: You're not the guy.
Sheldon: Are you sure? It would explain so much, your constant presence in my apartment, that baffling dalliance with Leonard just to be near me, the way you call me sweetie all the time.
Penny: I call everyone sweetie.
Sheldon: You tramp!

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Sheldon: I'm not sure how to respond, Leonard. I don't own Amy. You can't own a person, at least not since?
*Leonard stares at him*
Sheldon: 1863. When President Lincoln freed the?
*Leonard looks fed up*
Sheldon: Slaves. Come on, Leonard. If you're gonna teach history, these are the kind of facts you'll have to know.
Leonard: You know what, never mind.

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Sheldon: Why would I feel safer with Zachary Quinto at the foot of my bed?
Leonard: I don't know, he was pretty bad ass on Heroes.
Sheldon: (Thinking about it) ... Nope. Sorry Quinto, you're going back!

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Sheldon: I know he (Spock) wouldn't care for an outburst of human emotion, but oh goodie, oh goodie, oh goodie!

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Sheldon: Now, today's episode of 'Fun with Flags' is not fun. But it is important: Flags. You gotta know how to hold 'em, you gotta know how to fold 'em.

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Sheldon: What part of an inverse tangent approaching an asymptote don't you understand?

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Sheldon: I don't know what your odds are in the world as a whole but as far as the population of this car goes you're a veritable mack daddy.

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Sheldon: Radio contact is sufficient. No need to extend your middle finger.

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Sheldon: Geology isn't a real science!

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Amy: I was proposing massaging your muscles with your own hands.
Sheldon: Still sounds like a lot of unnecessary touching.

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Sheldon: Engineering. Where the noble semiskilled laborers execute the vision of those who think and dream. Hello, Oompa-Loompas of science.

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Sheldon: I see no organizational system in here whatsoever. Which panties do you wear on Mondays?
Penny: I don't need panties, I just need shorts and a shirt.
Sheldon: My mother always told me one should wear clean underpants in case one is in an accident.
Penny: One was already in an accident.
Sheldon: Doesn't mean one won't be in another, especially if I'm driving.

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Sheldon: I find zombies dancing in choreographed synchronicity implausible. And also it's really scary.

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Sheldon: Soft Kitty, Warm Kitty, Little Ball of Fur! Happy Kitty, Sleepy Kitty, Pur, Pur, Pur!

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Sheldon: I'm not saying that all senior citizens that can't master technology should be publicly flogged. But, if we made an example of one or two it might give the others incentive to try harder.

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Sheldon: She was girl who was my friend, and not she is a girl who is not my friend.
Penny: That has to be the worst country music song ever.

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Leonard (looking at the heavy box and the stairs): Do you have any ideas?
Sheldon: Yes, but they all involve a Green Lantern and a Power Ring.

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