Amy: Sheldon, what am I gonna do about my maid of honor? I mean, Bernadette gave me all these bridal magazines. She even folded down the pages with the good dresses.
Sheldon: Hmm. Hmm. I get it. You know, Leonard once borrowed my Edmund Scientific catalogue and dog-eared some pages. Never got 'em straight again.
Amy: Well, that is exactly the same thing. You really understand my dilemma.

Howard: How you feeling?
Bernadette: Eh. But I am really excited to meet our son.
Howard: Me, too. I thought I'd be super freaked out. But I'm ready for this. Well, not the part where you're in labor and you squeeze my fingers till they turn blue.
Bernadette: I'm sorry. That must be really painful for you.
Howard: It is. I mean, last time, I- Okay, I see what you're doing.

Raj: Hey! [carrying food] I brought Chinese.
Penny: [pointing to Raj] And I brought Indian.

Sheldon: Just look at her over there. She just started, and she gets to put up "Staff Picks." I've been coming here for ten years, I still can't put up "Sheldon Dislikes."

Amy: So we break down each of the roles into their component parts, and then design specialized tests for each.
Sheldon: Exactly. Boy, if I had known getting married was going to involve so much science, I'd have proposed years ago.

Bernadette: I'm sorry I tried to sneak the name past you.
Howard: That's okay.
Bernadette: I'm sorry I used up so many good names in college. I was really competitive with my roommate.
Howard: Forget about it. Please.

Amy: But how do we apply quantitative metrics to something as subjective as choosing a wedding party?
Sheldon: That decision only seems subjective. In reality, people in a wedding party perform very specific functions, and some will perform those better than others. If I may use a superhero analogy-
Amy: You may not.

Amy: How are we gonna make these decisions without anybody getting upset?
Sheldon: Well, what if we take emotion out of the process, and base it on empirical metrics? Then we aren't really making the decision; the data is.
Amy: So we can hurt our friends' feelings without taking any responsibility? Me likey.

Sheldon: Don't worry. I don't expect you to bear them all. I'm sure we can find a suitable uterus to rent. [looks to Penny]
Leonard: No!
Penny: Uh-uh!
Amy: We weren't thinking about you.
Sheldon: Of course not. (grunts) I am going to the kitchen. Can I get anybody anything? Penny, nice glass of milk and a multivitamin?

Raj: Yeah. Like just now I wanted to get a croissant, but I didn't want to hear you say, "Ooh, la, la."

Amy: I think I got Bernadette in trouble. Maybe we should go.
Sheldon: I-I can't. She and I are playing Campaign for North Africa.
Amy: (sighs) She doesn't want to play that.
Sheldon: Neither did the Egyptians, but that didn't stop Rommel.

Sheldon: Excuse me. I was wondering if you could recommend something.
Denise: Oh, sure. You want to tell me what you like?
Sheldon: I would not.
Denise: All right, well, you're wearing a Green Lantern shirt, so I'm guessing you're a DC fan. Although that's from the Alan Scott era, so you're probably not super into the current run. How would you feel about an alternate history where World War I was fought with dragons and magic?
Sheldon: That's what I wanted the theme of my tenth birthday party to be!

Bernadette: You know what, maybe we're putting too much pressure on this. It doesn't matter what we name him. He's gonna be amazing.
Howard: You're right. This kid is part you and part me.
Bernadette: Yeah. He's gonna be smart and kind and funny.
Howard: If he cracks five-foot-six, it'll be a miracle.

Penny: Okay, we go down and back up. ... And back up!
Bernadette: Yeah, hearing you is not the problem.

Sheldon: Well, I would say that this constitutes a catering crisis.
Amy: I agree. Who's gonna step up and handle it?
Leonard: Doesn't matter. This is fine.
Amy: Penny?
Penny: (mouth full) What?
Howard: You know what? I'll take care of it.