Bernadette: When I went by the office they gave me coffee and cookies and no one peed on me. I miss that so much.

Amy: Good news, we have save the date cards.
Raj: Huh, didn't go with my calligrapher. Interesting.

Sheldon: Well, I suppose we can give it a look, and if it doesn't work out, I hear that there is a nearby Chinese restaurant that Einstein used to frequent.
Amy: Or, we pick a place we like, and don't worry about Einstein.
Sheldon: Boy, reality TV is right; brides are crazy.

Raj: So, how has it been, being home with two kids?
Howard: Oh, tiring, but super rewarding.
Raj: Oh, like Pilates, yeah, got it.

Howard: Here's my dilemma, I kind of want to stay home. But Bernadette is a way better parent than I am.
Raj: Wait, does Bernadette want to stay home?
Howard: I don't know. She's really invested in her career, and she's doing great. I think it should be me.

Amy: Well, it seems kind of perfect, and it's close enough to your office, so you can use the bathroom you like.
Sheldon: Mm. I put a sticker over the auto-flush, so it doesn't startle me.

Amy: I really like it.
Sheldon: Mm. Oh, I must admit, I do, as well. Look at how somber all the men in these portraits are. I feel like that sets a good tone for our wedding.

Amy: I mean, Leonard and Penny are right there.
Sheldon: But he told me he checked on our membership just last week, and we were still 400th in line.
Amy: I'm sure there's an innocent explanation that won't ruin my day at all.

Sheldon: How did you get in here?
Penny: What do you mean? Leonard's a member.
Sheldon: You told me it was incredibly exclusive.
Leonard: Y-Yeah, look, about that, I lied.
Penny: Hey, wait, you told me it was exclusive, too.
Leonard: Mm-hmm. I avoided him and impressed you, all with the same lie.
Penny: Damn, Hofstadter, didn't think you had it in you.

Sheldon: I can't believe Leonard lied to me. What are we gonna find out next, that he's not really lactose intolerant, hmm? He's just friends with an invisible trumpet player?

Amy: So do we agree? Do we want to get married there?
Sheldon: I don't know. I mean, Einstein was a member. I like that. You know? But Leonard's a member, and that really steams my clams.
Amy: Oh, I love it when you're folksy. I'm just gonna call.

Bernadette: You're just trying to prove that you'd do a better job than me.
Howard: You're pretty sharp having just woken up.

Bernadette: Howard, we both know you can't keep up this pace. By this afternoon you're gonna be passed out on the couch and I'm gonna have three exhausted babies to deal with.

Howard: You know, in fact, why don't you take the day off?
Bernadette: Mm, fine. Maybe I'll have lunch with Penny.
Howard: Take your time. Get a massage. You deserve it after all the sleep you've been getting.

Sheldon: Yeah, so if you could just please leave before I get angry and say something I will regret about your face, your height, your personal hygiene or the fact that your science, while serviceable, lacks panache.
Leonard: That's actually one of the nicest things you've ever said about my work.
Sheldon: And now I regret it. Good-bye.