Howard: And his new balcony looks right down on our hot tub, which meant we couldn't do anything.
Raj: So you gave your kids Benadryl for nothing?
Howard: Why do I share with you? You're such a yenta.

Leonard: Excuse me. Remember you all came here to check out my cool new laser?
Sheldon: Oh, right. I'm gonna go wait in the car.

Bert: I need some help with a meteorite I found.
Leonard: Ah. I'd be happy to.
Bert: Oh, no, I meant Raj. I really need an astrophysicist.
Raj: Wow. This is exactly like a dream I had. Except in the dream, you're Gal Gadot.

Howard: So, is there anything we can do?
Nathan: Absolutely. Do you know if they have permits for the balcony?
Bernadette: Oh, no. We were hoping you could check.
Nathan: I certainly can. I just need you to fill out a form, and we have them available in Armenian, Chinese, Cambodian, English, Farsi, Korean, Spanish and Vietnamese.
Howard: Well, English, obviously.
Nathan: Well, we're not allowed to presume. That was a whole other meeting.

Bernadette: So we just fill out the form and that's it?
Nathan: Oh, no. No, you need to fill it out, and then you need to bring it down to the Office of Code Compliance. Now, if your neighbors don't have a permit, you can file an official complaint, but if they do have a permit, then you have to make the case that the balcony constitutes a nuisance, an encumbrance or an encroachment, and you have to decide which, because they are three totally separate forms.
Howard: This is starting to seem like more trouble than it's worth.
Nathan: I know, right?

[Leonard sneezes]
Stuart: You okay?
Leonard: Yeah.
Stuart: Great, 'cause you just bought that whole row of Batmans.
Leonard: Sorry, I [sneeze]
Stuart: And now you bought Aquaman. Good choice.

Leonard: Just seems dumb to not use the laser.
Stuart: Not as dumb as unleashing a plague on mankind, but, hey, what do we know?
Leonard: Literally nothing.

Bernadette: Sheldon, if you like this stuff, why don't you come and do it with us?
Howard: Or instead of us?
Sheldon: [gasps] Do you mean it? No, no, wait, it's too late. You can't take it back.

Penny: Well, Amy, looks like the elevator might have been the high point of your day.

Sheldon: Purell. Purell. Purell. Purell. Can I top anybody off?

Leonard: It's just so frustrating. I know my laser would be way more efficient. They're gonna lose so much meteorite due to kerf loss.
Penny: Mm. I'm sorry your friends won't let you play kerf with them

Penny: All right, well, why don't you go to bed. I'll sleep out here on the couch.
Leonard: No, no, no, you take the bed. I'll stay out here.
Penny: Even better. Sweet dreams, snot bag.

Sheldon: Okay, what is the setback on property lines in this neighborhood?
Bernadette: Oh, I don't know.
Sheldon: It must be on the permit from when you built your deck.
Bernadette: Uh, yeah, my dad built this. We didn't do the whole permit thing.
Amy: Here we go.

Sheldon: You think you know people.
Amy: You do know them, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Yeah, but-but do we? Do we really know them?
Amy: Yes!

Sheldon: They're rule breakers, Amy. And you know what we do with rule breakers?
Amy: Complain about them to our spouse until she's ready to drive into oncoming traffic?
Sheldon: You can't cross a double yellow line. What is this, the Purge?