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Quote from Leonard in the episode The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation

Leonard: Hey. Listen, since we got, you know, interrupted last night, I didn't have a chance to give you this.
Penny: Oh, Leonard, you shouldn't have. Oh, boy! What is it?
Leonard: It's a snowflake. From the North Pole.
Penny: Are you serious?
Leonard: Uh-huh. It'll last forever. I preserved it in a one percent solution of polyvinyl acetal resin.
Penny: Oh, my God. That's the most romantic thing anyone's ever said to me that I didn't understand.
Leonard: It's actually a pretty simple process. You see, cyanoacrylate are monomers which polymerize on... [Penny kisses him]

Quote from Penny in the episode The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation

Penny: Leonard, you're back.
Leonard: Yeah, I just stopped by to say… [Penny grabs Leonard and kisses him] Yeah, so, hi!
Penny: Hi! [They stumble into her apartment while kissing]

Quote from Zack Johnson in the episode The Lunar Excitation

Leonard: So, how'd you two guys meet?
Zack: My company designs the menus for the Cheesecake Factory.
Leonard: Your company?
Zack: Well, it's my dad's, but me and my sister are VPs.
Leonard: So, menus?
Zack: I know it sounds easy but there's a lot of science that goes in designing them.

Quote from other character in the episode The Lunar Excitation

Amy: You should also know that all physical contact, up to and including coitus, is off the table.
Sheldon: May I buy you a beverage?
Amy: Tepid water please.
Wolowitz: My God, what have we done?

Quote from Zack Johnson in the episode The Lunar Excitation

Zack: Hey, I want to see this laser thing.
Penny: Oh, but what about the party?
Zack: It's a surprise party, doesn't matter when we get there.

Quote from Zack Johnson in the episode The Lunar Excitation

Leonard: Don't worry about the moon. We, we set our laser to stun.
Zack: Smart.
Leonard: Now, we'll be able to see the beam when it leaves, but it won't be strong enough when it comes back to be seen by the naked eye.
Zack: (chuckling) Naked.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation

Penny: When I was a senior in high school, one of my friends heard I was gonna be named head cheerleader, I was so excited. My mom even made me a celebration pie. Then they named stupid Valerie Mossbacher head cheerleader, big old slutbag.
Sheldon: Are you saying that you think a celebration pie is even remotely comparable to a Nobel Prize?
Penny: Well, they're pretty tasty.
Sheldon: And on a different, but not unrelated topic, based on your current efforts to buoy my spirits, do you ever truly believe that you were fit to be a cheer leader?

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Staircase Implementation

Leonard: Two degrees, Sheldon. I just want to turn the thermostat two degrees.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Pirate Solution

Penny: Ah, it's nice having the place to ourselves, isn't it?
Leonard: Uh-huh. Now that Raj is working for Sheldon, I don't have to chauffeur him around anymore. Plus, yeah, with them working late so much, we get some privacy.
Penny: Mm-hmm. Hey, want to get a little crazy?
Leonard: What are you thinking?
Penny: Let's slide over to Sheldon's spot and make out.
Leonard: You are a dirty girl.

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Staircase Implementation

Leonard: Dr. Cooper?
Louis: No, you want the crazy guy next door.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Staircase Implementation

Leonard: There you go, three against one.
Sheldon: They don't get a vote. It's one against one. And according to the roommate agreement, all ties will be settled by me.
Leonard: But I said no to that.
Sheldon: And I said yes. And I settle all ties.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Staircase Implementation

Leonard: Not only did Sheldon save my life, he didn't rat me out to the landlord. Or the police. Or Homeland Security.
Penny: Okay, so, basically, you're the reason I have to walk up and down three flights of stairs every day?

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Staircase Implementation

Sheldon: Section nine, miscellany. The apartment's flag is a gold lion rampant on a field of azure.
Leonard: We have a flag?
Sheldon: Never fly it upside down unless the apartment's in distress.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Staircase Implementation

Penny: Why on earth did you agree to all that?
Leonard: It was the best apartment I'd seen, the rent was very reasonable and after you've passed the first three barriers you kind of want to take it all the way.
Penny: Well, I'm sorry, Leonard, it's very hard to feel sympathy for you.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Staircase Implementation

Sheldon: All right, next question. Kirk or Picard?
Leonard: Oh, uh, well, that's tricky. Um, well, uh, Original Series over Next Generation, but Picard over Kirk.
Sheldon: Correct. You've passed the first barrier to roommate-hood. You may enter.

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