Sheldon: Boy, oh, boy. This vacation is off to a wonderful start. The smell of formaldehyde, the whir of the centrifuge, the distant chatter of lab animals being dispatched for dissection. Mm, I can already feel my cares just melting away.
Amy: I'm excited to work with my boyfriend. It's going to be romantic.
Sheldon: Way to kill the mood.

Penny: Coming. Yup, that's good. Wine glasses should have handles. (Answers the door to Amy)
Amy: Keeping accurate track of your alcohol intake. Smart idea considering how trampy you get when you've had a few.
Penny: You heard what I did?
Amy: I heard who you did.

Sheldon: Now, today's episode of 'Fun with Flags' is not fun, but it is important. Flags: You gotta know how to hold 'em, you gotta know how to fold 'em.

Sheldon: You were right, the tiara was too much.

Mary: Oh, it is a hoot and a half. You write your sins on a clay pigeon, they fire 'em up in the air and you pulverize 'em with a twelve gage shotgun full of our Lord's forgiveness.

Wolowitz: You don't seem to be understanding the English word no. Maybe a different language will help. Russian: Nyet. Chinese: Bu. Japanese: iie. Klingon: qo. Binary-coded ASCII: 01101110 01101111.
Sheldon: It's actually 01100111.

Amy: Sheldon, is it possible that your foul mood -- or, to use the clinical term, bitchiness -- is because your mother isn't making you a priority?
Sheldon: No. Or, to use the clinical term: "nuh-uh."

Sheldon: I know he (Spock) wouldn't care for an outburst of human emotion, but oh goodie, oh goodie, oh goodie!

Sheldon: That reminds me of another saying: You can lead a chicken to Crisco, but you can't make your mother fry it.
Mary Cooper: Sheldon, you pester me one more time about chicken and I will put you over my knee right here in this restaurant.
Leonard: Please pester her? Please? For me.

Leonard: What did you think of the sushi?
Mary: It was good. The only thing that would have made it better is if it was cooked. And if it was beef.

Sheldon: Wine and a girl in the dark. He's going to be bored out of his mind.

Amy: Gentlemen, as much as I'm sure Sheldon would enjoy playing intergalactic make-believe, he and I have other plans. We are attending my Aunt Flora's 93rd birthday party. Sheldon: Just tell her I can't come. Amy: She'll be disappointed if we don't show up. Sheldon: She's 93. She won't be disappointed for very long.

Mary: Just because a cat's got kittens in the oven doesn't make 'em biscuits.

Amy: Oh, are we nervous, Dr. Cooper?
Sheldon: No. What you see is a man trembling with confidence.

Penny: It's kind of heavy.
Bernadette: Too bad you're not as strong as the dude in the painting.