Penny: I love him. This is just happening too fast.
Sheldon: You think this is fast? It's just a matter of time before I see Amy's leg stubble in my shower.
Penny: Yeah, and I've seen those legs. You might want to get some Drano.

Sheldon: Hello, home wrecker.
Penny: What did I do?
Sheldon: You gave Leonard somewhere to go. Thanks to you, Amy's out buying his and hers bath towels. Like I'd ever dry myself with something that has a possessive pronoun on it.

Leonard: Cut to the chase, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Okay. Amy's decided she wants to move in with me, so I need you to come back home, you lovable scamp. (rubbing Leonard's head) That's a lot of product.

Sheldon: It's Penny's fault.
Amy: What?
Sheldon: She doesn't want to live with Leonard, so he has to come live here again. She's the snake in our garden. She's the reason we can't be happy.

Sheldon: Hey, good buddy. So, uh, I was just talking to Amy, and she made me realize that this little dust-up between you and me is much ado about nothing.
Leonard: Is that so?
Sheldon: Yes. All is forgiven, so come back home. I'll make you some soy hot chocolate, and then I'll you tell you about our exciting new devil-may-care bathroom policy.

Sheldon: Well, the equation balances, but it's certainly not elegant.
Kripke: Whatever. Did you get any last night?
Sheldon: Yes.
Kripke: Gave it to her good, huh?
Sheldon: No, I gave it to her well.

Kripke: You guys ever use any toys?
Sheldon: I do have a model rocket next to my bed.
Kripke: A rocket? You're a freak! I love it!

Penny: Okay. Hang on. Are you saying some day that you and Amy might actually get physical?
Sheldon: It's a possibility.

Raj: Aren't you gonna to eat lunch?
Howard: Nah, I blew my food allowance on Pokemon cards.

Bernadette: That's so cute. I didn't think there could be a smaller version of you.

Kripke: You have some brilliant insights here, but if we're gonna make this work, you need to buckle down and focus.
Sheldon: I'll do what I can. But it's not going to be easy, because when I'm with Amy and our bathing suit areas mush together, boy howdy, is it magic.

Howard: My wife came with both fun bags and money bags.

Leonard: Maybe it's a shipping problem.
Howard: What?
Leonard: Maybe Wesley Snipes and Toucan Sam just got action figures that look like you guys.

Sheldon: I'm not interested in being published in Mad Magazine. Zingers fly fast in the Thunderdome, Barry.

Penny: All right, I don't understand. Why didn't you just tell Kripke the truth?
Sheldon: Because the truth made my look bad, whereas a ridiculous bald-faced lie makes me look good. Anyway, if Kripke asks, tell him my coitus with Amy is frequent, intense and whimsically inventive.