Raj: Baloney, okay? You two are as afraid of hurting someone's feelings as I am.
Bernadette: That's not true. We were just laughing right in your face.

Penny: Still haven't heard from her?
Sheldon: No, and I'm confused. It's been nearly 24 hours. Amy should have figured out she's wrong by now.

Howard: When he gets home, I'm dropping the hammer.
Bernadette: Ooh, I like when you take charge.
Howard: Oh, I'm not taking charge. You're the hammer.

Leonard: It's not just the date. We haven't talked about anything. Big wedding, small wedding, indoor, outdoor...
Sheldon: Outdoor? Oh. I can RSVP no right now.

Penny: All right, well, I want it in a church.
Leonard: Fine. I want black-tie.
Penny: Fine. I want to release butterflies.
Sheldon: Seriously? Airborne worms?

Leonard: Okay. Well, then it's settled: small indoor church wedding, black-tie, no butterflies.
Penny: Sounds perfect.
Leonard: Great.
Sheldon: You still didn't pick a date.
Penny: Stay out of it!
Leonard: Shut up!

Emily: It's a beautiful night.
Raj: Oh, yes, we've got the moon and the trees and Elizabeth McNulty, who apparently died when she was the same age I am.

Sheldon: Hey, next, why don't we tackle your penchant for whining and Penny's love of the old glug-glug?

Stuart: I felt bad for finishing your yoghurt, so I bought more. And, Howard, your favourite fruit is in season. Crunch Berries.
Bernadette: Don't let that sway you.
Howard: It's hard not to. They taste so much better than real berries.

Raj: Look, I care about you a lot, but we are very different people.
Emily: Are you breaking up with me?
Raj: No, no, I'm just pointing out that you're dark on the inside and I'm dark on the outside.

Leonard: So... we're still getting married?
Penny: Yes.
Leonard: Because we love each other.
Penny: Yes.
Leonard: And it's the happiest day of our lives.
Penny: *short laugh* Don't push it.

Leonard: I can do that. From now on, this mouth, you and food. That's it.

Sheldon: I may be an alien, but I have urges. If Amy wants to copulate by firing her eggs into space, well then I will happily catch them with the reproductive sack on my upper flermin. I'm not the best at reading facial cues, but I can see that you're a little turned on.

Raj: So you never played baseball as a kid? Not even little league?
Howard: Well, I was going to but the day of tryouts I found my dad's Playboy collection. Threw my arm out.

Penny: Well we're in Vegas. I want to go downstairs, get a bucket of margaritas, dance until I vomit all over a roulette wheel and watch it go everywhere.
Amy: What if we don't want to vomit?
Penny: Oh, you will. That's why they give you the bucket.