Penny: Oh, look at us. Our last Thanksgiving as husband and wife.

Howard: We've only been doing this 20 minutes?!
Raj: You know, I read that washing dishes can be an excellent form of meditation. The key is that while washing the dishes one should only be washing the dishes.
Howard: Just because you have that accent doesn't mean what you say isn't stupid.

Leonard: Hey, Stuart, got any plans Thursday night?
Stuart: My doctor's worried about my circulation so I was thinking about walking around the mall.

Penny: There's this doctor who refuses to see any sales reps. I've been trying to get in for months.
Leonard: Well, did you try wearing the shirt I said was inappropriate for work?
Penny: Well, the doctor's a woman, but yes, because you never know.

Bernadette: I just wish Stuart wasn't around so we didn't have to be so quiet.
Howard: I know. It's not like he returns the favor when he watches his Japanese porn cartoons.

Stuart: (from outside the room) You guys got a minute, or are you still cuddling?
Howard: What is it, Stuart?
Stuart: Can I come in?
Howard: Hang on. (quietly) Should I send him away?
Bernadette: No, it's okay.
Stuart: (from outside the room) Thanks, Bernie.

Dr. Gallo: Sounds like you're holding on to quite a bit of anger towards her.
Leonard: Oh, no, I-I've worked through a lot of that stuff; I'm better now.
Dr. Gallo: Mmm, good for you.
Leonard: Do you know she never let me celebrate my birthday because being born was her achievement, not mine?
Dr. Gallo: That's heartbreaking.
Leonard: Right? To this day, I send her a card every year with a little money in it.

Raj: Okay, so once we receive the next image and compare it to the ones we've already collected, we'll know what it is that we found.
Sheldon: Ooh, perhaps it's a Heliosheath scintillation.
Raj: It could be a trans-Neptunian object.
Sheldon: Maybe it's a new planet.
Raj: Unlikely, but it could be a dwarf planet.
Sheldon: Well, as long as it has a healthy gravity and all its moons, I'll be happy.
Raj: Okay, the final image is coming in. And the object we discovered is-
Sheldon: Come on, Daddy needs a liveable planet he can rule with an iron fist.

Howard: I'll give it to him next time I see him.
Bernadette: Have you heard from him since he left?
Howard: No. You'd think he would've called once he got settled in.
Bernadette: Hmm, maybe he's busy.
Howard: Too busy to call? He wasn't too busy to binge-watch Hot in Cleveland with my Hulu password.

Dr. Gallo: Wow, you really do have a lot on your plate.
Penny: I do. You know, Leonard's right. Talking to you is really helping.
Dr. Gallo: Oh, I'm glad. You know, you might also benefit from a prescription for anxiety.
Penny: Okay, if you think it'll help. Oh, just don't make it Placinex. I do not need sudden fits of homicidal rage.

Sheldon: You know, I'm not the only one who's unpleasant when they're sick. When Penny got food poisoning, she threw up so loudly I could barely hear the television.
Amy: Ooh, I just heard something. Might be hail, might be gunfire. Either way, I'm gonna go take pictures.

Sheldon: Now let me see you feel bad for lying and staying in Detroit longer than you needed to.
Amy: (monotone) I feel so, so bad.
Sheldon: Hey, we're both great at this.

Claire: Do you think I could pick your brain for my movie some time? It's animated sci-fi for kids.
Raj: Sure. I love animated movies.
Howard: He does, and he has the Lilo & Stitch collector plates to prove it.
Raj: Excuse me for wanting a little magic in my life.

Bernadette: The real question is, where are you with Emily?
Raj: Uh, it's hard to say. I think we're good, but things like this make me wonder if Emily's really the right person for me. I mean, did you guys ever have doubts about each other?
Howard: No. Never.
Bernadette: Absolutely.
Howard: What?
Bernadette: Howie, you forget how much of our early dates involved you doing magic and me doing this.
Howard: Fine. I had reservations about you, too.
Bernadette: No, you didn't.
Howard: No, I didn't.
Bernadette: Well, it doesn't matter now, 'cause I love how things worked out.
Howard: Me, too. And I think you're even more beautiful than this rose.

Raj: Okay, we did have a vibe. This is exciting. What's my next move?
Bernadette: You still have a girlfriend.
Raj: Right. Good catch.