Leonard Hofstadter Quotes Page 3 of 56

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Quote from the episode The Vartabedian Conundrum

Stephanie: I don't see anything at all, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Well, you're the doctor, but I am constantly hearing this annoying sound.
Leonard: Me too.
Sheldon: Is it a high frequency whistle?
Leonard: No, it's more of a relentless, narcissistic drone.

Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Howard: So you're saying, if in the depths of despair she throws herself at you and demands you take her right there, right now, you'll just walk away?
Leonard: I said I'm her friend, not her gay friend.

Quote from the episode The Middle-Earth Paradigm

Leonard: Homo habilis discovering his opposable thumbs says what?
Kurt: What?

Quote from the episode The Precious Fragmentation

Leonard: What was that?
Penny: Sheldon tried to steal the ring so I punched him.
Leonard: That's my girl!

Quote from the episode The Toast Derivation

Sheldon:He'll be back.
Leonard: (Through the door) Of course, I'll be back, I live here!

Quote from the episode The Gorilla Experiment

Bernadette: Come here, tushie face.
Leonard: Tushie face! That is going on twitter right now.

Quote from the episode The Space Probe Disintegration

Leonard: Do you realize I don't live with the woman I love because of you? No other reason. Just you.
Sheldon: Is that true?
Leonard: Yes, it's true. The last time I brought it up, you had an emotional breakdown, got on a train, and ran away.

Quote from the episode The Comic Book Store Regeneration

Leonard: The place really looks great.
Raj: Yeah, you should have burnt it down years ago.
Stuart: I keep telling you, I didn't burn it down.
Leonard: We know. We know. Because burning something down for the insurance money is a crime. *wink*

Quote from the episode The Friendship Contraction

Leonard: You call that a glow stick? *Pulls out a Lightsaber* That is a glow stick!

Quote from the episode The Irish Pub Formulation

Leonard: I'm sorry.
Raj's sister: Why do you say that?
Leonard: When I'm in bed with a girl, that's just my natural response.

Quote from the episode The Infestation Hypothesis

Leonard: Sheldon, you do this all the time! You fixate on some crazy idea then blow it way out of proportion.
Sheldon: Name one time I've ever done that.
Leonard: How about the time you put GPS trackers in your garbage because you thought North Korean spies were stealing your doodles? The chicken nuggets you thought were human nuggets. The mysterious cloud that was following you around town. Or the time you put my shirt on by accident and thought you were growing again.
Sheldon: I said name one. You need to work on your listening skills.

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Leonard: Can I go back and prevent you from explaining that to me?
Sheldon: Same paradox. If you were to travel back in time and, say, knock me unconscious, you would not then have the conversation that irritated you, motivating you to go back and knock me unconscious.
Leonard: What if I knock you unconscious now?
Sheldon: It won't change the past.
Leonard: But it'd make the present so much nicer.

Quote from the episode The Cushion Saturation

Penny: What are we gonna do?
Leonard: We? No, no, no. You had your chance to be "we" for like a year and a half now. Right now, you are you and you are screwed!

Quote from the episode The Locomotive Manipulation

Leonard: I'm not sure it's a good idea to take Penny to where wine comes from.

Quote from the episode The 21-Second Excitation

Leonard: Would someone please turn off the Sheldon commentary track?

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