Leonard Hofstadter Quotes Page 4 of 56

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Quote from the episode The Engagement Reaction

Leonard: I'm the king of foreplay.

Quote from the episode The Hamburger Postulate

Leonard: If Penny didn't know that Leslie had already turned me down then that would unambiguously mean that she, Penny, thought I should ask her, Leslie, out, indicating that she, Penny, had no interest in me asking her, Penny, out but because she did know that I had asked Leslie out and that she, Leslie, had turned me down then she, Penny, could be offering me consolation. "That's too bad, you would have made a cute couple" but while thinking "good, Leonard remains available."
Sheldon: You're a lucky man Leonard.
Leonard: How so?
Sheldon: You're talking to one of three men in the western hemisphere capable of following that train of thought.
Leonard: Well, what do you think?
Sheldon: I said I could follow it, I didn't say I cared.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Stephanie: So, how was your day?
Leonard: You know, I'm a physicist, I thought about stuff.
Stephanie: That's it?
Leonard: I wrote some of it down.

Quote from the episode Pilot

Leonard: Our babies will be smart and beautiful.
Sheldon: Not to mention imaginary.

Quote from the episode The Romance Resonance

Penny: Just you wait and see. I'm gonna romance your freakin' ass off.
Leonard: That's beautiful. Is that Shakespeare?

Quote from the episode The Pancake Batter Anomaly

Leonard: (To Howard and Raj) Sheldon is at the Cheesecake Factory.
Leonard: (On the phone to Penny) Just tell him to go home.
Penny: Well, he won't leave. He says he's afraid he'll pass out on the bus and someone will harvest his organs.
Leonard: (to Howard & Raj) He is paranoid and he has established a nest.

Quote from the episode The Middle-Earth Paradigm

Leonard: I call Frodo!
Sheldon, Raj, and Howard: Damn!

Quote from the episode The Monopolar Expedition

Sheldon: Everyone at the university knows I eat breakfast at 8:00 and move my bowels at 8:20.
Leonard: Yes, how did we live before Twitter?

Quote from the episode The Shiny Trinket Maneuver

Sheldon: Hard as this may be to believe, it's possible that I'm not boyfriend material.
Leonard: Glad I was sitting down for that.

Quote from the episode The 21-Second Excitation

Raj: Guys, I just did a quick calculation. Judging by the size of the theater and this line we may not get in.
(Sheldon wakes up and jumps out of his chair.)
Sheldon: What did he say?
Leonard: Nice going, Raj. I just got him down for his nap.

Quote from the episode The Weekend Vortex

Leonard: I'd make fun of Sheldon for having girl problems, if I wasn't shocked that Sheldon has girl problems.

Quote from the episode The Bon Voyage Reaction

Leonard: Sheldon's nervous about me leaving. Just keep an eye on him while I'm gone.
Penny: Oh, I don't know. Remember what happened when I took care of your goldfish?
Leonard: Well, flush Sheldon down the toilet and get me a new one.

Quote from the episode The Romance Resonance

Penny: Sheldon, you wanna take a break? Your food's ready.
Leonard: What are you doing? He's both happy and quiet. It's like seeing a unicorn and big foot at the same time.

Quote from the episode The Romance Resonance

Howard: So I'm almost done writing the song for Bernadette. Are you cool playing the cello?
Leonard: If by cool you mean willing to, yes. If by cool you mean cool, clearly you've never seen me play the cello.

Quote from the episode The Romance Resonance

Sheldon: How do I make them stop loving me?
Leonard: You could invite them to live with us.

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