Penny: Hi. We're just heading out for a drink.
Amy: Because I do that now.
Bernadette: Count your blessings you're not a Tanzanian chimp.
Priya: What?
Penny: Don't listen to her, she's had a lot of ice cream.

Leonard: Hey.
Penny: Hi, how was the screening?
Leonard: Oh, Sheldon invoked Rosa Parks to make somebody who cut the line feel bad, but only the white people felt bad.
Penny: Ugh, I should've never bought him that colouring book that explains Black History Month.

Penny: Hey, listen, what if we have a little mother-in-law, daughter-in-law dinner tonight?
Beverly: So just the two of us?
Penny: Or I invite a few girlfriends, 'cause hearing you say the two of us just sent a chill right down my spine.

Penny: Don't take advice from a man who threw his shoe at a crow.

Penny: So, if you don't mind me asking, do you think you might start dating again?
Dr. Koothrappali: It's much too soon for that. Why, do you know someone?
Penny: No, but if things don't work out with me and Leonard, I'll call you. Wait, how much do you talk about Star Trek?

Penny: It's kinda boring. Although it did get exciting for a minute when Amy inhaled a wool ball.

Penny: There's got to be something fun we can do that the guys will hate.
Leonard: Hang on, why do we have to hate it?
Penny: Three words: Doctor Who convention.

Penny: (On the phone) Anyway, I'm really sorry I made fun of your stutter in high school.
Bernadette: You're doing great.
Penny: Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Oh, God, just finish the sentence. Okay, well, I'm sorry you feel that way. Bye. No one wants to hear my apologies.
Amy: I think your mistake is doing it over the phone. If they could look into your eyes, they'd melt.
Bernadette: Penny, it doesn't matter what you did in the past. You're a good person now.
Penny: That's easy for you to say. You weren't just called a b-b-b-b-bitch.

Penny: Have fun.
Sheldon: Oh, I will. Nothing more fun than a paradigm shifting evening of science.
Penny: (To Leonard) And you thought it was soaping me up in the shower.

Amy: I can't believe you got up and walked out of an audition for a big movie.
Penny: I did. I mean, I walked in, read for the part, then stunk up the place, but then I walked right out.

Penny: Oh, thank you very much. Come back soon. With the other half of my tip.

Penny: Sheldon, come in.
Sheldon: Thank you. I'd like to make a sandwich, but I'm out of bread.
Penny: There's some in the fridge.
Sheldon: You shouldn't keep your bread in the refrigerator. Staleness is caused by crystallization of the starch molecules, which occurs faster at cool temperatures.
Penny: On Earth, we say thank you.

Leonard: Don't make it sound childish. It's the scientific word for dust.
Penny: What was wrong with "dust"?

Penny: No, it's not that.
Bernadette: Then why?
Penny: Honestly, I don't know if I'm up to it. You know, the last project I managed was my high school yearbook.
Bernadette: And?
Penny: And that was the year we didn't have one. - And? And that was the year we didn't have one. Apparently, the printers won't make them without getting paid.
Bernadette: What happened to the money?
Penny: Uh, if I didn't know then, I'm not going to magically know now.

Penny: There, nice and comfy cosy. Zero, zero, zero.
Sheldon: There's one more zero. You forgot the time parameter.
Penny: Sit on the damn couch.