Season 2 Quotes Page 37 of 46
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Raj: Did you guys see the new budget memo that went out this morning?
Leonard: Yeah, more cutbacks.
Sheldon: Unacceptable. It baffles me why they don't simply let some of you go so that there's money available for my research.
Leonard: You know what baffles me, Sheldon?
Sheldon: Based on your academic record, any number of things, I would imagine.
Howard: Court-martial, shmort-martial, Leslie Winkle is the fifth girl I've ever had sex with. I mean, for free.
Raj: And plus, you got a rapid prototyper. That's an expensive piece of equipment, dude.
Leonard: And the rest of us have had our budgets cut to the bone.
Howard: Okay. One way to look at this is I'm getting new equipment and you're not, and that's unfair. But a better way to look at this is that I'm getting sex and you're not, and that's delightful.
Sheldon: That is my spot. In an ever-changing world, it is a single point of consistency. If my life were expressed as a function on a four-dimensional Cartesian coordinate system, that spot at the moment I first sat on it would be zero-zero-zero-zero.
Penny: Boy, I love him, but he is one serious wackadoodle.
Howard: Don't come in, Ma.
Mrs. Wolowitz: Why not?
Leslie: He's got company.
Howard: Oh, there's the arrhythmia.
Mrs. Wolowitz: Is she Jewish?
Howard: Are you Jewish?
Leonard: There's no discernible butt print.
Penny: Oh, come on. (Sits and wiggles around) There, butt print.
Leonard: It's too small and perfect.
Penny: Thank you.
Leonard: You're welcome.
Leonard: Why don't you just eat in your desk chair?
Sheldon: Why don't I just eat in my desk chair?
Penny: Here we go.
Sheldon: That is my desk chair, that's where I work. I don't eat in my desk chair and I don't work in my spot. I work in my desk chair and eat in my spot.
Howard: Hey, ma, you got to rent me a tux!
Mrs. Wolowitz: Right now? What kind of sex are you having up there?
Leonard: Why are you crouching there?
Sheldon: This is my spot. Where else am I supposed to crouch?
Leonard: I don't know, Texas?
Leonard: Penny, I think I know what to do. Sheldon, I have some more bad news.
Leonard: I'm afraid so. You know the cashew chicken I get you Monday nights?
Sheldon: Yes. From Szechuan Palace.
Leonard: Szechuan Palace closed two years ago.
Sheldon: What? Where did my cashew chicken come from?
Leonard: Golden Dragon.
Sheldon: No. No, this isn't right. Our food always comes in Szechuan Palace containers.
Leonard: Yeah, well, before they went out of business, I bought 4,000 containers. I keep them in the trunk of my car.
Sheldon: What's real? What isn't? How can I know?
Penny: You did make that up, right?
Leonard: Oh, God, I wish I had.
Leslie: Hey, are you enjoying that prototyper I got you?
Howard: Oh, it's great. Everybody in the Engineering Department is eating their hearts out.
Leslie: Isn't it nice when your good fortune makes others miserable?
Howard: You know, most people don't get that.
Leonard: This conference is kind of a big thing. The keynote address is being delivered by George Smoot.
Penny: Oh my God, the George Smoot?
Leonard: You've heard of him?
Penny: Of course I haven't.
Leonard: Wow, teasing the guys at the Apple Store seems a little redundant now.
Sheldon: I don't follow.
Leonard: I wouldn't expect you to.