Leonard: Penny, I told you if you don't put him in his crate at night, he just runs around the apartment.

Sheldon: Oh, here's a fun fact. Ketchup started out as a general term for sauce, typically made of mushrooms or fish brine with herbs and spices. Some popular early main ingredients included blueberry, anchovy, oyster, kidney bean, and grape.

Penny: I think we'll pass.
Howard: Oh, is the Mrs speaking for the couple now?
Leonard: In this case, you bet she is.

Sheldon: If you want to blend in with Penny's friends, I'd think looking like an idiot would be the perfect camouflage.

Sheldon: There there, everything is going to be fine... Sheldon's here!

Howard: Raj says he can teach you - what do call it? (Raj repeats it to him again.) Uh, I don't know some Indian meditation crap.

Sheldon: I see. I assume since the rest of you have set the bar so low, you're saving the most impressive contribution for last. Go on Howard, dazzle me.
Howard: Well, my power is the ability to pretend like I give a damn about your piddly-ass problem. And that's 24/7 buddy.

Sheldon: Give us the precious!

Rajesh:So in Avatar, they have sex on Pandora by linking their ponytails. So their ponytails...are like their junk.
Wolowitz:Yeah, so?
Rajesh: Well when they ride the horses and birds they link their ponytails, too.
Wolowitz: What's your point?
Rajesh: My point is, if I were a horse or a bird I'd be really nervous around James Cameron.

Howard: Wazzup, my nerdizzles?

Sheldon: Where's the ring?
Leonard: It's in a Fedex box on its way back to where it came from.
Raj: The fires of Mount Doom?

Leonard: What am I supposed to ask her? "Hey Penny, you got any friends that you never want to talk to again?"

Sheldon: And you can start sorting protons and neutrons while I build carbon atoms!
Leonard: No, I don't think so. We need to go home now.
Sheldon: But I'm still working!
Leonard: If you don't come out of there, I'm gonna have to drag you out.
Sheldon: You can try, but you'll never catch me.
Leonard: Oh for God's sake. Sheldon, come here.
Sheldon: Bazinga!

Penny: What happened?
Leonard: Sheldon's escaped and he's terrorizing the village.

Howard: How long has he been stuck?
Leonard: Hmm, intellectually about 30 hours, emotionally about 29 years.