Leonard: Oh, no, no, no, don't look in there.
Penny: What, is it secret?
Leonard: No, it's a nitrogen laser. It'll cook your eyeball like a soft-boiled egg.
Penny: Oh. You might want to put a sign on it.
Leonard: Sign right there.
Penny: Ah. Danger. Sure, sure.

Penny: What's-what's that?
Leonard: Uh, that is an integrated ion trap and time-of-flight mass spectrometer.
Penny: Wow. High-techie-techie. What's this little box?
Leonard: That is a pencil sharpener.
Penny: Ooh, low-techie-techie.

Penny: So, what are you working on right now?
Leonard: It's actually pretty neat.
Penny: Yeah?
Leonard: Yeah. It's a front-projected holographic display combined with laser-based finger tracking. Here, I'll show you. We'll just put this pencil over here.
Penny: Sharp. Thanks to the machine we saw earlier.

Leonard: And then a laser will map the reflective surface, and voila. (A floating 3-D image of the pencil appears. Leonard moves it around with his finger)
Penny: Wow. That is amazing.
Leonard: You know, there's a foundational idea in string theory that the whole universe may be a hologram.
Penny: What do you mean? (Leonard flicks a switch. The hologram changes to a view of the planet Earth). Oh, wow!
Leonard: Uh-huh. Well, the holographic principle suggests that what we all experience every day in three dimensions may really (changes projection to the solar system) just be information (changes the projection to the galaxy) on a surface located at the farthest reaches of our cosmos. (Sets the galaxy spinning) So it's possible that our lives are really just acting out a painting on the largest canvas in the universe.
Penny: Hmm.
Leonard: What?
Penny: Sometimes I forget how smart you are.
Leonard: You should visit more often.

Raj: Before I forget, I'd like your opinion on the menus I've prepared for the Halloween party. The theme is "Food That Goes Bump in the Night".
Howard: "Creature from the Black Forest Ham Lagoon".
Raj: On sesame seed bunzillas.
Sheldon: "Night of the Living Garlic Bread"?
Raj: It's funny because bread sounds like dead.
Sheldon: I'm sorry, but these are just ordinary foods with the names bent into tortured puns. The dishes themselves are in no way Halloweeny.
Raj: Ooh, Hallo-weenies! That's a good one. They'll pair nicely with my "Draculoni and Cheese". How do I do it?

Howard: That reminds me, I was thinking about wearing my NASA jumpsuit as a costume. But then I realized everyone would be, like, where's your costume? Why are you wearing your work clothes, you nut?

Leonard: Hello, boys.
Sheldon: What are you smiling at?
Leonard: Nothing.
Howard: You know where's there's a lot of nothing?
Everyone: Space.

Howard: Boy, it's nice to sleep in a bed with gravity again. Did I tell you about the night my retainer floated out of my mouth and into the air lock?
Bernadette: Yeah, you mentioned it once or twice.

Howard: So, here we are, just a couple of young newlyweds. What to do? What to do to you? Astronaut Wolowitz, reporting for booty. Preparing thrusters. We have liftoff. Are we clear to jettison that nightgown?
Bernadette: Okay, we need to talk.

Howard: What?
Bernadette: Howie, I know you went to space. I'm incredibly proud of you. But you might want to try and not bring it up every minute.
Howard: I don't talk about it every minute.
Bernadette: Tonight at dinner you went on bout it for an hour straight.
Howard: What was I supposed to talk about? We were eating at Johnny Rockets.

Penny: Whoa! That is very cool.
Leonard: Sometimes I like to turn this on and pretend I'm the super villain Magneto.
Penny: Getting a little less cool, Leonard.
Leonard: But what I really am is a very smart scientist who understands the mechanics of the universe and is wearing the sexy black underwear you bought him.
Penny: There we go.

Raj: Oh, by the way, can I borrow your bull-whip and fedora?
Howard: Yeah, sure, whatever.
Raj: I was thinking of dressing up as Indiana Jones' mocha-skinned love child, Indian Jones.

Sheldon: What if we were to go as dinner table favourites salt and pepper?
Amy: You know salt makes me retain water and my cousin William was ground to death in a pepper factory accident.

Amy: How about Raggedy Ann and Andy? I loved them growing up.
Sheldon: No, I don't think so. Those dolls represent three things I do not care for: clowns, children and raggedness. I think it's a lost cause.

Bernadette: How do I look?
Howard: Fine.
Bernadette: Uh-oh, is someone a little blue? Come on, Howie, thats like the funniest thing I've ever said in my life.