Amy: What do you say? It sounds kinda perfect.
Penny: It does, but somehow he managed to take all the fun out of it.
Sheldon: Once again, it's what I do.

Raj: You call yourself a friend? I was trying to help you. And at the first sign of trouble you ran away, leaving me to fend off a family of rats! You're a completely selfish human being and a physical & moral coward.
Sheldon: His statements of the obvious continue to annoy.

Leonard: Interesting. We're being accused of making you do things you don't like, and here you are doing the same thing to poor Amy.
Sheldon: You should point out the hypocrisy of that.
Leonard: That's what I was doing.
Sheldon: Oh, that was wasn't clear. Do it again but this time drive it home with, "how do you like them apples, missy?"

Penny: Besides, aren't you the one who says there's nothing more important than the advancement of science?
Sheldon: No, I said there's nothing more important than me advancing science.

Kevin Smith: I'm actually in pre-production on a movie right now. Way different than anything I've ever done before. It's called Clerks 3. You should come over and read for a part.
Penny: Oh, my, I would love that.
Leonard: You have a new job.
Penny: Well, maybe I can do both.
Leonard: I don't think you can do both.
Penny: I don't think I asked you.
Kevin Smith: Yeah, you tell him, Penny.
Leonard: Stay out of it, Kevin Smith.

Penny: Shouldn't you be getting ready for work?
Sheldon: I'm not going. Would you like to know why?
Penny: You're sad about not getting any thing done last night, so you're gonna sit around and pout about it.
Sheldon: Boy, I'm not nearly as mysterious as I think I am.

Raj: Maybe he's playing bingo with his mommy?
Howard: Sad how some guys just can't cut the apron strings.
Raj: Okay, now you're messing with me.

Penny: Doc, you've got see what you're doing is a little creepy.
Dr. Lorvis: You sound just like Sigourney Weaver when I followed her into a restroom.

Sheldon: Sorry, kid, you got it worse than a gibbon.

Penny: So when do you guys think you're gonna move in?
Howard: We're still figuring how much remodelling we want to do.
Bernadette: It's tricky finding the right balance between tasteful modern and Jewish mother chachki crap fest.

Bernadette: Howard, get off of him.
Howard: Not until he stops humping his way up my family tree.

Penny: Thanks for cooking.
Leonard: My pleasure.
Penny: That carrot was delicious.
Leonard: Yeah. I wish I'd fought harder for the rest of 'em.

Sheldon: Why would you have surgery?
Leonard: Because I can't breathe. I snore. I get sinus infections.
Penny: Back off, he's all mine.

Leonard: Okay, fine. Sheldon, may I please visit your fort?
Sheldon: I want to say no, but it's too glorious. Get in here!

Sheldon: I'm so excited. And I just can't hide it.
Leonard: Oh. I'm about to lose control. And I think I like it.
Sheldon: What are you talking about?