Sheldon: Did you see that? He just cut the line.
Leonard: He's just joining his friends; it's fine.
Sheldon: No, it's not fine. It is a breach of line etiquette.
Howard: We're near the front of the line. We'll get in either way.
Sheldon: What if every person in front of us let someone cut?
Leonard: We'd still get in.
Sheldon: What if each of those people let someone cut?
Leonard: Still get in.
Sheldon: But then each of those people let someone cut?
Leonard: We'd still get in, but first I'd hit you over the head with his stick chair.

Guy: Is this guy for real?
Leonard: Boy, I wish I could say no.

Sheldon: Oh, Leonard, great news. We discovered a medium-sized asteroid together.
Leonard: Wow, that's amazing! I'm in a pretty great mood today myself.
Sheldon: Okay. Guess we're gonna talk about you now.
Leonard: Well, we are, because Dr. Gallo made me realize that I'm a worthwhile person and that my feelings matter.
Raj: I learned that for free from a cat poster, but good for you.

Sheldon: Excuse me, excuse me, can I please see a show of hands? Who here takes issue with this person cutting the line?
Guy: Told you.
Sheldon: Well, what a sad state of affairs. That you've all been so ground down by life, you don't even notice when someone disrespects you.
Howard: I can't believe we're gonna get beat up, and it's not because of your chair.

Sheldon: Why are you up?
Leonard: How am I supposed to sleep? I've been married less than twenty-four hours and my wife isn't speaking to me.
Sheldon: Perhaps you can think of this in a more positive light. In one day, you've managed to do what it takes many couples decades to achieve.

Leonard: Hey.
Penny: Hi, how was the screening?
Leonard: Oh, Sheldon invoked Rosa Parks to make somebody who cut the line feel bad, but only the white people felt bad.
Penny: Ugh, I should've never bought him that colouring book that explains Black History Month.

Penny: Well, then it's settled. Yay. So funny. I never thought my second marriage would be to you.

Sheldon: Hey, good news, I just got off the phone with my mother. She is coming to the wedding.
Penny: Okay, wait, you're inviting people to our wedding?
Sheldon: Yes, I'm inviting people to our wedding. Yeah, I've already asked Stephen Hawking and Robert Downey Jr, and, now don't get your hopes up, 'cause he's pretty busy, but Erno Rubik.
Bernadette: Who's Erno Rubik?
Sheldon: Seriously? He invented the Rubik's Cube.
Penny: Okay, fine, but why would you invite him to our wedding?
Sheldon: Because, despite his fame and fortune, he strikes me as a lonely man.

Raj: Hey, it's not my fault if American women project their fantasies on foreigners with the kind of magical voice that grants wishes.

Penny: Wow. The last time I saw my grandma, the most exciting thing was watching the ash of her cigarette get longer and wondering if it was gonna fall in her pudding.
Leonard: Did it?
Penny: Yeah, right in there. She ate it and everything.

Raj: All right. I've made up my mind. I'm gonna do the right thing, call this girl, and let her know that I'm in a relationship.
Howard: Okay, so far we've heard, "Made up my mind, I'm dumping Emily."
Bernadette: "Made up my mind to date both of them by pretending to be twin brothers."
Howard: And "Made up my mind, 'll ask for a threesome and if they say no, play it off as a joke."
Raj: I'm calling her. And the threesome didn't deserve the belly laugh it got.
Bernadette: You're right. It could totally happen. (laughing)

Sheldon: Wow. Marriage must agree with you. You are just glowing.
Leonard: I'm not glowing. I'm upset.
Sheldon: Well, whatever it is, it agrees with you.

Sheldon: Knock, knock, knock, Penny. Knock, knock, knock, Penny. Knock, knock, knock, Penny.

Sheldon: Where are you going?
Professor Proton: I don't know, but hopefully somewhere I can wear pants.

Sheldon: Would you mind opening the door and then angrily slamming it behind me?
Penny: Sure.
Sheldon: Thank you.
And slam it hard, because I am pretty steamed.