Howard: And his new balcony looks right down on our hot tub, which meant we couldn't do anything.
Raj: So you gave your kids Benadryl for nothing?
Howard: Why do I share with you? You're such a yenta.

Bert: I don't really have dreams, when I sleep or in life.

Bert: I need some help with a meteorite I found.
Leonard: Ah. I'd be happy to.
Bert: Oh, no, I meant Raj. I really need an astrophysicist.
Raj: Wow. This is exactly like a dream I had. Except in the dream, you're Gal Gadot.

Howard: And then Andy said if we want privacy, we should plant some trees. The only way I know how to do that is to give a dollar and tree shows up in Israel.

Leonard: Excuse me. Remember you all came here to check out my cool new laser?
Sheldon: Oh, right. I'm gonna go wait in the car.

Bernadette: Oh. That is bright!
Howard: Yeah, a new neighbor put in floodlights.
Bernadette: Huh.
Howard: So, shall we?
Bernadette: No. I don't want to take my robe off under a spotlight. This is a candle body.

Bernadette: Ooh, it's freezing out here.
Howard: Would you like me to heat things up?
Bernadette: No, I want to get in the hot tub before I lose a toe.

Andy: Howdy, neighbors! We haven't met yet. I'm Andy.
Bernadette: Oh. Hello. Nice to meet you. You know, your new balcony kind of looks right over our fence.
Andy: You might want to put up some trees. We can see everything.
Howard: You can, but it's okay if you don't.

Bernadette: So, can you turn your lights off?
Andy: Sorry, they're motion-sensored. They'll go off in a minute. Just try to stay still.
Bernadette: (door closes) What are we gonna do about this?
Howard: I say we wait until his lights go off, and then I make hot, motionless love to you. Don't move. It's go time.

Penny: All right, now, I'm sure some of you are wondering, "Who is this woman? "How did she get to be in charge of the sales team? Is it because she's friends with Dr.
Rostenkowski?" Because she is.
"Is it because she was Miss Cornhusker 2001 and still fits in those very same jeans?" 'Cause she was, and she does, and they're actually a little baggy.
Or is it because she's the best damn salesperson here? Because I am.
Now that we're clear on that, here are the drug specs and marketing strategy for Inflamminex. Which, now that I say it out loud, might be a placeholder.

Bernadette: That was really impressive.
Penny: Damn right it was impressive.
Bernadette: Okay, that tone doesn't work with me.
Penny: Sorry, boss.

Penny: By tomorrow, I want everyone to have this committed to memory.
Karen: Do you have it committed to memory?
Penny: You want to have a contest, Karen? Winner gets a yogurt.

Bernadette: I'm just saying. She went to college. She's really smart.
Penny: Well, I'm smarter than Karen. I can read the word "Penny" on a cup of yogurt.
Bernadette: Why are you getting so upset? I'm agreeing with you. This is a big job, and I need someone who's up to it.
Penny: I am up to it. I'm just nervous about it.
Bernadette: I know. And that's why I don't want to pressure you into doing something that you clearly don't want to do.
Penny: I know what you're up to.
Bernadette: Is it working?
Penny: Yes.
Bernadette: So I'll see you Monday morning?
Penny: Yes.
Bernadette: I bet I can make that girl president.

Receptionist: Uh, President Siebert, Dr. Cooper is-
Sheldon: I need to talk to you about the paper that Dr. Fowler and I published.
President Siebert: Send him in.

President Siebert: All right. I respect your decision.
Sheldon: You do?
President Siebert: Yes. You and Dr. Fowler have my full support.
Sheldon: Oh, okay. I anticipated a little more pushback.
President Siebert: Sorry, my job here is to serve your needs, both academic and personal.
Sheldon: Huh. Well, now I'm filled with all this nervous energy. I don't know quite what to do with it.
President Siebert: We have a fully equipped gymnasium.
Sheldon: Yeah, really? Where's that?
President Siebert: It's part of the new sports complex.
Sheldon: Oh. And where is that?
President Siebert: Come on, I'll show you.
Sheldon: Are there monkey bars?