Amy: Why don't you just tell him you don't want to go?
Penny: I can't, it'll break his heart. You know, he's always making an effort to do things with me he doesn't enjoy, like going outside.
Amy: He is an indoor cat.

Bernadette: Well, distance might be nice. The last time a big project ended for Howie, he wouldn't stop following me around. He even went with me to get a mammogram.
Penny: Well, what's wrong with that?
Bernadette: No, he wanted to get one with me, like some kind of weird couple's massage.
Penny: And yet you bore his child. Neato.

Penny: Oh, let me guess. You guys are drafting your fantasy accounting firms.

Raj: Wait a minute. Hey, let me see your phone.
Sheldon: Why?
Raj: Well, it's possible it was tracking everywhere you went.
Amy: Phones can do that?
Raj: Yeah, it depends on the privacy settings.
Penny: Oh, tha- that's so cool. How do you- how do you turn that thing off? (laughing nervously)
Leonard: Relax. I know when you "go for a run," you stop for a donut.
Penny: I don't even run there, I drive.

Penny: Something happen at the meeting?
Sheldon: They made me promise I wouldn't talk.
Penny: And you talked?
Sheldon: Well, now, see? You knew what was gonna happen. Why didn't they?

Stuart: What you working on?
Bernadette: Trying to catch up on office e-mails before I go back.
Stuart: Oh, that's right, maternity leave's almost over. Are you excited?
Bernadette: Yeah, I mean, I'll miss Halley, but it'll be nice to get out of the house, be intellectually stimulated. Go out to lunch instead of, you know, (points to her breasts) being lunch.

Leonard: You're not really considering working for him, are you?
Penny: Well, maybe, I mean, it seems kind of perfect. I have sales experience, and I've been a waitress, so I have restaurant experience, and if he's figuring out my Christmas bonus, we could buy a boat.

Stuart: Uh, other than burp you or give you a bottle, I don't know what to do right now.

Bernadette: So you wanted to learn something physical and you came to Howard Wolowitz?

Howard: Hey, what's for dinner?
Bernadette: Meatloaf.
Howard: (half-heartedly) Oh, cool.
Bernadette: Stuart made it.
Howard: (upbeat) Oh, cool.

Howard: Speaking of which, for day care, it'll be easy for me to drop her off, unless you want to do it.
Bernadette: Hmm, guess it should be me.
Stuart: I can't do it; they have a picture of me on file now.

Sheldon: That's it. I'm in breach of my security clearance. I'm going to prison. And you know what happens to people like me in prison. I'll be forced to be some large man's tutor.

Bernadette: What if she likes the people who work there more than us?
Howard: She already likes soap bubbles more than us.

Penny: Yeah, lying isn't my favorite part of the job. Actually, I'm not crazy about a lot of it.
Zack: Hey, if you're not happy there, I've been looking for a new head of sales at my company. And we don't sell drugs, just menus, so the only lie you'll be telling is we print on recycled paper. We don't.

Leonard: Ask him.
Sheldon: Um, yes. Howdy, partner. Do you happen to recollect if I left a notebook in these here parts?
Raj: These here parts?
Sheldon: It's called fitting in. By the way, good luck.