Sheldon: We're engaged.
Raj: Oh, my God, that's amazing! Wait, uh, tell me everything.
Sheldon: Well, Dr. Nowitzki was kissing me-
Amy: Okay, you can stop leading with that part of the story.

Sheldon: Come on. How many times have we banded together to try to save a show that we loved? Let's shake things up and try to kill one.

Leonard: Isn't the important thing that there's a show to get kids excited about science?
Sheldon: Who cares about kids and what they like? This is about me and something I liked when ... when I was a kid.

Raj: What if the reboot is great?
Sheldon: That's even worse. If-if I like it, I'll feel like I'm being disloyal to Arthur. He was a mentor and a friend, and I won't toss him aside for some Hollywood pretty boy like Wil Wheaton.
Raj: It's hard to argue with him.
Leonard: Because he makes no sense? Yeah.

Leonard: Okay, the next drug is Romatrol.
Penny: Oh, I know this one. We're actually pushing it really hard. It treats mild dermatitis.
Leonard: Uh, correct. And who can it be prescribed to?
Penny: Adults and children who have absolutely, for sure, stopped growing.

Leonard: Would you ever get a vasectomy?
Raj: Uh, in case you haven't noticed, Indians aren't too big on birth control. There's probably, like, a million more of us since we started this conversation.

Howard: You know what? Forget the past. What do you say you and me build this rocket?
Sheldon: That sounds like it could be a real bonding experience for us.
Howard: Right?
Sheldon: Oh, I see. Oh, you think that's a positive.

Penny: I thought Raj was helping you out.
Howard: No, he had to work. Plus, he has a quota for the amount of Indian servant jokes he can tolerate, and, apparently, I filled it.

Leonard: Hey, you can always reshoot it.
Sheldon: Mm, I suppose. And, you know, maybe I could even get some tips from someone who's acted professionally.
Penny: Oh. Sheldon, obviously, I'd be happy to help you out.
Sheldon: I don't know what to say.

Amy: I'm just saying that my research may actually change the world forever.
Bernadette: I hope it does. 'Cause I'm going to see that world from a yacht so big you could land a helicopter on it!

Raj: Guys, I mean, he's around, okay? He's apparently not happy about the breakup, and based on the sweatpants he left at her place, he's, like, a medium to large man.
Howard: Maybe those are his "after the holiday" pants, like you have.

Bernadette: Can you get us a little snack?
Penny: You sure you don't want your spy to do it?
Howard: What are you talking about?
Penny: You really don't trust me? You had to have Amy stop by?
Bernadette: We trust you.
Howard: Yeah. You were a terrible waitress, and we still asked you to get us a snack.

Howard: Hey, uh, the bride and groom seem to be running a little behind. Do you think you could stall?
Mark Hamill: Stall? How?
Howard: Hey, everybody! Uh, it's gonna be a few more minutes, but while we wait, does anyone have any questions about Star Wars? *lots of hands go up* You got this.

Penny: Maybe there's something in the book that will help.
Leonard: Worth a shot.
Penny: Okay. Let's see, let's see. "Biting other children"?
Leonard: Well, sometimes, but problem for another day.

Wil Wheaton: Sheldon, I promise that I will work my hardest to make this show great so that a whole new generation of kids will grow up and they will be able to say that Professor Proton was the reason they got into science.
Sheldon: Wow, that was very persuasive.
Wil Wheaton: Thanks.
Sheldon: But I won't be seduced by your acting skills nor your movie star charisma. There's only one Professor Proton, and he had neither of those things.