Leonard: You know, Amy still does some performing. She and Sheldon do an Internet show about flags.
Mrs. Fowler: Amy? V-Videos on the Internet? You know what men use those for.
Raj: If you're talking about Fun with Flags, I use it to go to sleep.

Sheldon: Amy, you said something about my bow tie that I can't stop thinking about.
Amy: Don't you mean (in a Southern accent): "Y'all said something 'bout my bow tie"? Go on, say it. Say it.

Bernadette: Did you do the laundry?
Sheldon: I sure did. Ooh, he's gonna be steamed. Just like his dress shirts.

Bert: Sheldon, you left your jacket in my office last night.
Sheldon: Uh, oh. No-no, I didn't. That's-that's not my jacket.
Leonard: Then why does it say, "Property of S. Cooper. Stop touching it."?
Sheldon: It sounds like someone named Scooper doesn't want you touching his jacket.

Mark Hamill: Well, that was unexpectedly beautiful. (sniffles) I might need a minute.

Sheldon: I came here to propose. If you'd said no, I wouldn't want to stick around looking at your stupid face.
Now, mind you, your face is only stupid in the "no" version of the story.
Amy: But I said yes, so I get a lifetime of this.

Mark Hamill: Do you (clears throat)- Do you-
Wil Wheaton: Hey, I'm just saying, I'm here if you need me to step in.
Mark Hamill: No, no, no. I got this.

Raj: I used to have the stuffed raccoon from Guardians of the Galaxy, but Cinnamon licked it raw.
Howard: There's a time and place for your randy dog stories, and it's never and nowhere.

Bert: Hey, you want to hear one of my geology songs?
Raj: So it's about rocks?
Bert: Better. It's about a boulder.
Raj: Isn't that the same thing?
Bert: Far from it. A boulder has a diameter greater than 25.6 centimeters.
Raj: Is that fact in the song?
Bert: No ... yes.

Amy: I'm just saying, if you think the work is interesting, nothing else should matter.
Sheldon: You're right, Amy. That is sage advice. Which is surprising, considering your momma is so dumb, she-
Amy: (Gets up and leaves) Nope.
Sheldon: (After Amy's gone) She studied for a urine test. (chuckles)

Amy: Oh, that's Sheldon. Oh, he's upset with Leonard and Penny. (phone whooshes) And Bernadette. (phone whooshes) And Mark Twain?

Stuart: Great. So, as two genderless blobs of human flesh, how would you like to go to Sheldon and Amy's wedding with me?
Denise: Oh, Stuart. Look, I appreciate that, but it just might be a little weird, considering you're my boss.
Howard: Guess who's gonna officiate Sheldon and Amy's wedding! Mark Hamill! Luke Skywalker is gonna be at the wedding!
Denise: You'll need to buy me a dress.

Sheldon: Hello, Arthur.
Professor Proton: What-what part of "rest in peace" don't you understand?

Amy: That's not much of an apology.
Sheldon: Yeah, because he's not really sorry. Obviously, he wanted a place to go where I wouldn't be and apparently all of outside wasn't enough for him.

Sheldon: I suppose you're here because you heard the news?
Professor Proton: Sheldon, I'm a figment of your imagination. I don't hear news.