Raj: Yeah. Like just now I wanted to get a croissant, but I didn't want to hear you say, "Ooh, la, la."

Sheldon: I believe today is Bernadette's due date.
Howard: Yeah. How do you know that?
Sheldon: Easy. 40 weeks from the date of her last period.
Howard: And why do you know that?
Sheldon: Well, excuse me for taking an interest in people.

Sheldon: Well, I would say that this constitutes a catering crisis.
Amy: I agree. Who's gonna step up and handle it?
Leonard: Doesn't matter. This is fine.
Amy: Penny?
Penny: (mouth full) What?
Howard: You know what? I'll take care of it.

Sheldon: Not so fast. I believe we have one tenant here who has not made her voice heard.
Amy: Oh.
Sheldon: We're waiting, fiancée.
Penny: Yeah, we're waiting, best friend.
Leonard: Yeah, we're waiting, neighbor who needed a battery and totally got one from me, no strings attached.

Bernadette: Howie? Howie, wake up. It's time.
Howard: Oh. Did your water break?
Bernadette: No.
Howard: Are you feeling any contractions?
Bernadette: No.
Howard: Wait. Well, where are you going?
Bernadette: To the hospital. Today's my due date, and this crap needs to end now.

Leonard: Don't look at me. When the music stopped, you were holding Sheldon.

Penny: When did you pick out our kids' names?
Leonard: Remember that day you moved into the building?
Penny: (chuckles) Yes.
Leonard: A non-creepy amount of time after that.

Sheldon: So you're saying everyone walks on eggshells to spare my feelings?
Howard: No, of course not, because we don't want to hear you complain about how much you hate the sound of crunching eggshells.

Sheldon: Well, regardless, I can change.
Howard: Sure.
Raj: Yeah, of course you can.
Sheldon: You know, everybody thinks I'm so predictable. Well, tomorrow I'm gonna show up at work and do something no one will expect.
Howard: Wear a baseball cap backwards to prove your point?
Sheldon: ... Yes, but which hat?
Raj: Gryffindor.
Sheldon: Well, now that you guessed it, I'm not gonna do it.
Raj: Yeah, you will.
Sheldon: Yeah.

Sheldon: Suez? Birth? It's a big night for canals.

Amy: Sheldon, what are you doing?
Sheldon: I am decoding Dr. Wolcott's letter using this book as the key. Aren't conversations more fun when they're in code?
Bernadette: Yes. But I'm using a code where "yes" means "no."

Penny: Hey, how'd it go?
Leonard: Well, apparently he's not leaving and I have to go get him sparkling water.
Penny: Why are you smiling?
Leonard: I don't know. It just feels right.

Howard: Honey, babies don't always come on their due date. Halley was two weeks late. [seeing Bernadette's stare] But this baby's a boy. They don't take as long to get ready.

Howard: But this time-
Stuart: It was me. Yeah. I was trying out a flirty new smile.
Howard: Now, I don't use the word "ghoulish" a lot, but I-I just can't think of another word.

Raj: It's just it's hard talking to my other friends about this, but I knew you would understand.
Stuart: Why is that?
Raj: Because you and I are both alone, which is actually kind of comforting, because at least we can be alone together.
Stuart: Mm. This is, this is awkward. I, um, I was actually gonna close up a little early tonight 'cause I have a date.
Raj: Really?
Stuart: Yeah.
Raj: (clears throat) Forgive me if I'm having trouble being happy for you.
Stuart: Don't be silly, I'm loving your pain.