Sheldon: My brother.
Amy: Wait a minute. You didn't invite your brother to your own wedding?
Sheldon: He tormented me my whole childhood. I don't think I should reward that type of behavior with a slice of wedding cake in the shape of the Millennium Falcon.
Amy: Try again.
Sheldon: A slice of wedding cake in the shape of a cake.

Sheldon: No, my mother. Guess who she's insisting we invite to our wedding.
Amy: Jesus?
Sheldon: If only.

Leonard: So, is this Georgie?
Sheldon: Yes. And what is he even using that stethoscope to listen to?
Leonard: I don't know, small leak?
Sheldon: All right, that makes sense.

Howard: Anyway as angry as I was with him leaving, building this stuff is probably what led me to become an engineer.
Sheldon: I suppose, in his own way, my dad also encouraged me to pursue science. I mean, he is the one that taught me that flatulence is combustible. And also, polyester gym shorts don't burn. They melt.

Sheldon: He wasn't insane.
Leonard: He did fall in love with a pigeon.
Sheldon: Well, if we're gonna call Tesla crazy for loving something small and unappealing, might as well put Penny in a padded cell right now.

Amy: Hey, whatever kind of pink eye their kids have, I have, and I need to know. And if it's viral, I'm screwed.
Howard: Maybe not. You know, I know it's not traditional wedding attire, but how about a welder's mask?
Raj: If you know a welder, that could be your "something borrowed".

Raj: I had three model rockets as a kid, and that was the largest space program in India.

Georgie: If you are here about Sheldon's wedding, don't bother.
Leonard: Come on. I-I know you two have your differences.
Georgie: You mean pretty much everything about us?
Leonard: Well, not everything. (laughs) You're both tall ... you have the same last name ... Maybe I shouldn't have started this like it was a list.

Leonard: So, Penny's your favorite?
Beverly Hofstadter: I suppose she is. You married well, Leonard, and for that I am proud of you.
Leonard: I don't- I don't- I don't know what to say.
Beverly Hofstadter: I'm also proud of how hard you're trying not to cry.
Leonard: (choking up) Thank you.
Beverly Hofstadter: Would you like to hang up now?
Leonard: Yeah, here it comes.

Howard: I'm only saying this because I love you and because you can't reach me from that bed, but you sound a little crazy.
Bernadette: I love you, too, but I could fling this card in your eye like a ninja throwing star.
Howard: I don't believe you. (covers his eyes and backs out of the room)

Bernadette: Oh, and, Penny, she kinda threw up on your stuffed bear.
Penny: Oh, that's okay.
Leonard: Hey. That's an Ewok and it's mine.
Penny: Yeah, which is why it's okay.

Georgie: After all my sacrifices, guess which kid my mom is the most proud of?
Leonard: If it makes you feel any better, my mom's most proud of Sheldon, too.

Leonard: Oh, really? Is she FaceTiming with you right now? Because she's FaceTiming with my mom, and believe me, that is not a face you want to spend time with.

Leonard: Well, look, we don't fly out until the morning. Why don't I try and talk to him, give it one more shot?
Sheldon: All right. But if he says, "Nerd says what", don't answer him.
Leonard: What?
Sheldon: You are a lamb to the slaughter.

Georgie: So you know what I'm talking about. And has he ever thanked you?
Leonard: Not in so many words, or any words.