Season 8 Quotes Page 3 of 56
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Raj: Okay, here we go.
(To Leonard & Penny) Say cheese.
(To Sheldon & Amy) Say cheese.
(To Howard & Bernadette) Say cousin.
Stuart: Oh, so she's good enough for Howard but not for me?
Bernadette: Yeah. Go have weird relationships with your own mother and cousin. This is his turf.
Penny: This is why I've been saying we should keep champagne on ice.
Sheldon: That was tricky because when it comes to alcohol, she generally means business.
Howard: Hey, I threw out the first pitch at an Angels game.
Bernadette: He did it with a robot.
Josh: You had sex with a robot?
Howard: That's not what she meant.
Raj: But technically, yes.
Sheldon: Is that all you have? Shop-worn tidbits like "talk to her" and "let it go"? Gee, Penny, life's given me lemons, what should I do?
Penny: Well, you could shove them somewhere.
Bernadette: Are you okay?
Raj: No, I'm not okay. I feel like I'm going to jump out of my skin.
Bernadette: I told you not to wax down there. It's itchy when it grows back.
Penny: Do I really force you to do things you don't want to?
Amy: Yeah, but it's okay.
Penny: How is it okay?
Amy: I promised myself if I ever got friends I'd do whatever they said. Really, I'm lucky you found me before a cult did.
Penny: Wait, what is wrong with you two? He was talking about television during their date night.
Sheldon: Oh, not just date night. Our 5th anniversary.
Penny: Okay, see, that's even dumber than you wondering if being bitten by a goat would give you the powers of a goat.
Sheldon: If that happens, don't make me wait ten years to watch you eat a tin can.
Leonard: You know what, this bottle was meant to celebrate an achievement. Let's make a pact. When one of us gets their first big breakthrough, we'll celebrate by opening this bottle and toasting Professor Abbott.
Howard: I love that.
Raj: Me too.
Leonard: Then, of course, rubbing our success in Sheldon's face.
Howard: Well that's the best part.
Howard: You know, when I was a kid I loved going there but I could never get a ride.
Raj: Ooh, what if we got a van and drove around, and picked kids up?
Sheldon: Nice! Like at parks and schools.
Howard: Toy stores, puppet shows.
Leonard: Hold on, so your idea is to get a van and cruise the streets looking for kids to pick up?
Leonard: And are you going to use candy to lure them in?
Raj: We are now!
Penny: Ooh, we could go horseback riding.
Amy: I actually can't. My hips don't open wider than 22 degrees. I rode a very thin pony once. On the first bump I just popped right off.
Sheldon: I have some odd freckles on my buttocks. Can I make an appointment for you to look at them?
Emily: Erm, okay, I guess.
Amy: I'm with him three years, nothing. She's with him two minutes and he's taking his pants off.
Bernadette: Howard, get off of him.
Howard: Not until he stops humping his way up my family tree.
Leonard: Hang on, if you're making all this money, where is it?
Penny: In a safe place.
Leonard: What does that mean, under your bed?
Penny: No, it means a diversified portfolio of stocks and bonds. I'm not overly conservative. I'm young, so my guy said I can afford to take some risks.
Leonard: Wait a minute, you have "a guy"?
Penny: Don't you have a guy?
Leonard: Why would I have a guy?! I don't have any money!
Amy: This is an easy one. You love this guy.
Amy: Come on. He's an under appreciated genius.
Sheldon: Still think it's me.
Amy: It's not you. Now think, there's a car named after him.
Sheldon: Of course there is. The Mini Cooper because it's me.
Amy: How about this? He's a poor man's Sheldon Cooper.
Sheldon: Oh, Tesla.