Bernadette: Howie?
Howard: What's up?
Bernadette: Why does your Fitbit say you ran 174 miles yesterday?

Leonard: Hey, Barry, we're in trouble. We need liquid helium. Does the department have any we can use?
Barry Kripke: Sorry, there's a shortage. And what we do have I need for my quantum excitation study.
Sheldon: But you won't need much for that.
Barry Kripke: True, but if it's successful, I'm having a party with balloons.

Bernadette: You feeling okay?
Amy: We were together for so long, I honestly don't know what I'm feeling.
Howard: That's understandable. You forgot. It's called happy.

Sheldon: I didn't want to come in. I was told it would make everyone uncomfortable. So I'll just stay out here and pretend I don't need to go to the bathroom.

Penny: So, you gonna get up there later?
Sheldon: A microphone, a room full of inaccurate depictions of Polynesian religion, and a captive audience to hear about it? You bet I am.

Raj: What do you want to write?
Howard: Something bad-ass. You know, like "Thanks for diggin' our vibe. "We'll keep rockin' if you keep rollin'."
Raj: Dude, if I was wearing a bra, I'd throw it at your head right now.
Howard: I'll keep rockin'. You don't do that.

Amy: So, what'd you have in mind for tonight?
Sheldon: I thought I could take you out to a nice birthday dinner. If we pick a place
east of here, we might find the balloon.

Penny: Look, I'm sorry I said I was okay with everything before we got married. I hate that we're going through this, but I don't know what to do.
Leonard: If you don't mind waiting for a Groupon, we can try marriage counselling.

Penny: What do you think?
Bernadette: I don't know what to think, but then I just found out about it.

Penny: Am I being naive?
Bernadette: I don't know. This is all so new to me. I'm still processing.

Sheldon: Wil Wheaton, go.
Wil Wheaton: Sheldon, I know that we've had our ups and downs, but I can honestly say that my life is so much more interesting because you are in it. We may have met because you are a fan of Star Trek. But I have become a fan of Sheldon Cooper. Live long and prosper, buddy. And happy birthday.
Sheldon: That's how you do it, Wolowitz. Now you see why he's famous and you're not.

Dave: Okay, then. I'll, uh, see myself out. Amy, thank you for dinner.
Dr. Cooper, pleasure to meet you, sir. Uh, if perhaps sometime you have a spare moment, I'd, uh, love-love to discuss physics, or shoot the breeze, as you Yanks say.
Ah, what a lovely evening.

Leonard: Barry Kripke started a fencing club.
Sheldon: Interesting. Sword fighting does hold a certain elegant appeal. And I would imagine it meets many of our personal criteria for a sport.
Leonard: It's indoors, so no sunscreen.
Sheldon: No throwing, no catching, no running.
Leonard: No gym shorts that can be yanked down.
Sheldon: Or worse, up.
Leonard: Preach.

Dave: You know, I once drove 500 miles to hear him speak at Stanford.
Amy: I have a DVD of that lecture.
Dave: Really? Wasn't it great?
Amy: Not as a Valentine's present, no.

Leonard: So, Mother, I'm surprised you came all this way for Sheldon's birthday.
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, I was happy to. He did come to my 60th.
Leonard: Oh, you had a party for your 60th?
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, I wouldn't call it a party. Just a few close friends. And your sister and brother.
Penny: You know, to be fair, we did get married in Vegas and didn't invite her.
Beverly Hofstadter: And I never did thank you for that, dear.