Bernadette: I like the Wii.
Sheldon: Thanks, Grandma.

Amy: Sheldon, you said you were unhappy getting attention for something you wish you never did.
Wil Wheaton: Yeah, I know a little something about that.
Sheldon: Nonsense, Wil. Your endless tweets are not that bad.
Wil Wheaton: I remember why it's been a while.

Bernadette: So your boyfriend's a fixer-upper? Most of them are. I mean look at this guy. You think he came like this? When I met him he was a hot, goofy mess. Now, he's been to Space. That's all me!
Howard: I had a little to do with it.
Bernadette: Oh sure you did. Who's momma's big Space Man?
Howard: I am!

Howard: The man impersonating a bear would like you to know that, "Only you can prevent forest fires."
Raj: I don't get it.
Howard: You didn't have Smokey the Bear in India?
Raj: No. Was he anything like Munmun the Mongoose? He taught us not to play with cobras.
Howard: You had to be taught not to play with cobras?
Raj: You had to be taught not to burn down the forest?

Sheldon: (To Leonard & Penny) You can stop trying to make this about our relationship.
Amy: Which is stronger than ever.
Sheldon: Which is stronger than ever!

Raj: Oh my God, Cinnamon, are you okay? I can't believe you two (Leonard & Penny). (To the vet) You do whatever it takes to save her life. If she needs any new organs I'll buy any dog necessary and scrap them for parts!

Raj: His only options here are to fake a heart attack or have a real one.

Sheldon: I am a grown man. I am a professional scientist. And I currently occupy the moral high ground.
Mary: Go to your room.
Sheldon: But I occupy the moral high ground.
Mary: Go to your room.
Sheldon: But I'm a professional scientist.
Mary: Go to your room!
Sheldon: *Backs away to his room* I'm a grown man.

Sheldon: Oh look, a quarter!

Leonard: They've been in there for like half an hour.
Penny: Yeah, for future reference that's a while.

Leonard: Uhh, umm. I'm Leonard.
Penny: Really? You don't sound so sure.
Leonard: No, I am me.

Penny: We're engaged!
Raj: Wow. I thought me having sex with Emily was going to be the big news.
*Amy, Bernadette, Howard and Sheldon rush to Raj*
Leonard: Hey, hey. What the hell?!
Bernadette: You guys propose all the time, this never happens.
Penny: You're right. Yay!
*Leonard & Penny go to celebrate with Raj*

Amy: I love Little House. It made me want to live on a farm so much I tried to milk my cat. That tangy bowl of Cheerios was not worth the stitches.

Penny: Do you ever imagine what that would be would be like, not being born?
Leonard: *Sheldon's knock* What do you think? *Sheldon's knock* What do you think? *Sheldon's knock* What do you think?

Sheldon: Where's my lemonade?
Penny: I didn't get it.
Sheldon: A fitting swan song to your career as a waitress to forget my order one last time.